Tag: What About Dating?

‘Give us today the food we need,’ Matthew 6:11(NLT)

AWESOME JOB!

Congratulations on taking seven days to focus on biblical principles and how they can guide you in your romantic relationship! 

You started with the foundational truth that you can trust the advice you find in God’s Word. Then you came up with some practical applications to:

• Forget the upper hand
• Communicate well
• Share values
• Train together
• Be kind and forgive

Now, there’s just one more thing to remember. In fact, if you only remember one piece of advice from this entire series, it’s this:

Seek. God. First.

Pray

God, I want to trust you. I want to do things right. Help me to put you first because you are more important than anything.

Whenever we’re enjoying God more than any other person or thing, we find great meaning in our lives and relationships.

Read

Matthew 6:33

Reflect

It can be hard to believe that God will provide everything you need—even in your relationships. When you’re feeling anxious about your relationship, how can you turn to seeking God in those moments?

Respond

Memorize Matthew 6:33. When you find your focus shifting toward a relationship instead of the creator of relationships, recite this verse and ask God to take his rightful place in your life.

from What About Dating?

‘Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.’ Ephesians 4:32(NLT)

Let’s face it…relationships bring challenges. Disagreements. Conflict. These blips—or sometimes major roadblocks—can be opportunities to grow closer…or apart. How can we be prepared for when these situations arise? How can we offer kindness and forgive fast? 

Pray

Father, you are a God of forgiveness. Please give me a heart that can speak the truth in love, forgive completely, and usher in peace in my relationship. Show me the ways I can do this in my life starting now. Thank you for your example. 

We’re empowered to forgive people because we know we are—and are constantly being—forgiven by God.

Read

Ephesians 4:32

Reflect

What do kindness and tender-heartedness look like in your relationship? What’s harder for you: to forgive, or to ask for forgiveness? 

Respond

Talk to your partner about how to diffuse your next disagreement. Have a game plan that includes inviting God to soften your hearts and forgive each other as soon as possible.

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‘Do not waste time arguing over godless ideas and old wives’ tales. Instead, train yourself to be godly. “Physical training is good, but training for godliness is much better, promising benefits in this life and in the life to come.” ‘ 1 Timothy 4:7-8(NLT)

You don’t get good at something without putting in effort. People who want to accomplish a goal usually have to train. They pursue their passion with devotion. Intentionality and perseverance produce desirable outcomes. 

There are benefits to spiritual training, too. When you and your partner pursue God together through prayer, reading his Word, serving, and loving others, you build spiritual muscles. You store up eternal treasure in heaven. You open up opportunities for your relationship with God and each other to grow deeper and stronger. 

Pray

God, help us pursue you wholeheartedly and reap the benefits today, and into eternity.

Like any relationship, your relationship with God takes discipline and diligence.

Read

1 Timothy 4:7-8

Reflect

In what ways can a healthy relationship with God impact your relationship with your partner? 

Respond

Find a reasonable way for you and your partner to incorporate spiritual exercise into your relationship. One way could be to set aside 10 minutes each day to read a short passage of Scripture, thank God for one blessing, and pray for one need.

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‘Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort from his love? Any fellowship together in the Spirit? Are your hearts tender and compassionate? Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one mind and purpose.’ Philippians 2:1-2(NLT)

You’re dating someone special. You’re excited. You might even be on your way to being in love. It feels amazing. 

But before you get too wrapped up in romance, how much do you know about your partner’s values? Goals? Passions? Dreams? What are his or her views on faith, finances, family, and the future? Have you communicated with each other on these important, life-impacting viewpoints?

It’s healthy to have differences—but it’s also important to be aligned on the stuff that really matters. Sharing this information sooner than later can benefit you both.

Pray

God, you created each of us as precious, unique beings, and invite us to celebrate our differences. You also long for us to be united in areas of life that matter most to you. Please guide us to be aligned in your principles of truth. 

When people are united with Christ, they naturally seek deeper unity with each other, too.

Read

Philippians 2:1-2

Reflect

Think about what this Scripture teaches about God’s values. (You might try reading the rest of this short passage to get a fuller picture of what God cares about (Philippians 2:1-11). How do your personal values compare to this picture?

Respond

Discuss the topic of personal and godly values with your partner, beginning and ending in prayer for peace and clarity.

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‘Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. ‘ James 1:19(NLT)

Sometimes it’s tough to be truthful, sharing exactly what’s on your mind. You want to present your best self to the one you care about, afraid of what might happen if he or she found out what you really think about something. Or, maybe your feelings are hurt, and you expect your partner to read your mind. Sometimes you get angry and say things you don’t mean. Perhaps you’re experiencing jealous emotions, but it’s too embarrassing to explain. 

And often, you need to offer an attentive, non-judgmental ear to your partner. 

Dating is a time to learn about each other in order to make an informed decision about a long-term future together. To make this happen, you have to talk. You have to explain. You have to share. You have to listen. You have to practice communicating. Starting today! 

Pray

Father, you are so good at communicating your loving truth in your Word. Help me and my partner to share our hearts with each other in a respectful way that honors you.

Healthy relationships happen naturally as individuals seek to live faithfully for God—and one way we do that is to practice good listening.

Read

James 1:19

Reflect

What part of the verse fits you best: quick to listen, slow to speak, or slow to become angry? Where do you have the greatest opportunity to improve?

Respond

Establish weekly communication “check-ins” with your partner. Pray together, and then share one thing you appreciate about your partner, one hope or dream, and, if applicable, one thing that you’d like to see change in your relationship. 

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‘Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. ‘ Philippians 2:3(NLT)

Some dating “experts” suggest the game of playing hard to get. They recommend waiting a certain amount of time before communicating after a date. They warn against acting too interested too soon, or letting a person know how you really feel. The goal? To gain control—the upper hand in the relationship. 

But the Bible says otherwise. A relationship is an opportunity to speak truth. To put another person’s needs above your own. To care for the one you’re pursuing in a selfless manner. To desire another person’s happiness over your own. To be Christ-like.

Sounds pretty different? It is. But God’s approach works.

Pray

God, culture is telling me things that are contrary to what your Word says. Help me to hear your truth over the noise. Help me to act in a loving way that honors you and my partner. 

The apostle Paul describes how to work at loving each other well—through specific attitudes and behaviors.

Read

Philippians 2:3

Reflect

It’s easy to be selfish without realizing it. Have you ever tried to gain the upper hand in a relationship? Why? What was the end result?

Respond

Figure out one way to honor your partner today by putting his/her interests above your own. 

from What About Dating?

‘The instructions of the Lord are perfect, reviving the soul. The decrees of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The commandments of the Lord are right, bringing joy to the heart. The commands of the Lord are clear, giving insight for living. Reverence for the Lord is pure, lasting forever. The laws of the Lord are true; each one is fair. They are more desirable than gold, even the finest gold. They are sweeter than honey, even honey dripping from the comb. They are a warning to your servant, a great reward for those who obey them.’ Psalms 19:7-11(NLT)

Let’s face it. We’ve all made some dating mistakes in the past. 

Now, whether you are on a quest for that special someone, you’re already in a committed relationship, or, you’re trying to make a decision that involves your future mate, you probably want to get it right this time. 

You know the Bible offers guidance on—well, pretty much everything. 

But dating??

Even though the word “dating” doesn’t actually appear in the Bible, there’s a LOT of relational advice that can be gleaned from God’s guide for life.

It all begins with trusting him. His plan. His purpose for you. And the reality that he longs for you to be close to him … and he has designed you to be close with others, too. Then, it’s about doing the right thing—for yourself, and your partner.

So why not lean on the Lord for guidance on your relationship adventure? Why not take trusting him to the next level? Why not see what he has in store for you when you surrender yourself, your partner, and everything in-between—to him?

He won’t disappoint you.

Pray

Father, help me to trust your design for all things—including relationships. Right now, I need you to guide me in my dating decisions. Help me see the benefits of following your plan. Thank you. 

This psalm celebrates the wisdom and beauty of God’s truth. 

Read

Psalm 19:7-11

Reflect

What do you learn about the nature of God’s Word in these verses? Can you find six attributes of God’s law and the benefits they yield? How could they impact your relationship with a significant other?

Respond

Choose today to trust God in all things. Ask him to guide you toward a closer relationship with him and a closer relationship with your special someone.  

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