Tag: Reconnect: Refresh Your Marriage

‘Commit your actions to the Lord , and your plans will succeed.’ Proverbs 16:3(NLT)

‘Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. ‘ Romans 12:10(NLT)

Reflect on what God has shown you through His word. Commit to work toward continually honoring God’s plan for oneness in your marriage, and honoring your spouse through daily grace and kindness. Seek to show love, not only to feel loved. Thank God for what He is doing in your heart, mind, and marriage. Ask that He will continue to show you what His good plan is for your life, and your marriage. Ask Him to bless and multiply your efforts to follow His plans for marriage. Move forward with confidence – God’s purposes always stand! 

Prayer

God, you are kind and generous. I praise you because you are the creator and sustainer of all life. Thank you for giving your Word, to help me know you more, and to help me understand how to follow you into the details of my life. I pray that you will show me clearly how to follow your example of selfless love in my marriage. Amen. 

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‘For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.’ Ephesians 2:10(NLT)

‘Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. And when Christ, who is your life, is revealed to the whole world, you will share in all his glory.’ Colossians 3:1-4(NLT)

Beyond goals, begin to dream of what would truly make your marriage awesome! What would that look like for you two? Long ago, God dreamed up a unique purpose for you, and that includes what He does in and through your marriage. God is not limited by your current circumstances, so look beyond what’s in front of you right now. Think of His kingdom purposes; His heart of love for the church, for families, and for the poor and vulnerable. How might He be calling the two of you to live out His kingdom purpose in your family and community? How might you bring the love of Jesus into your corner of the world together? 

Prayer

Thank you, Lord, that I am no accident, but I am your workmanship. Thank you that my life is not happenstance, but that you have planned good things for me to do. I want to live on mission, full of joy and purpose! I pray that you will help me understand what it means to “set my sights on the realities of heaven,” and that my life will be shaped by that remarkable hope. Let my marriage be a reflection of your love in this world.

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‘For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.’ Philippians 2:13(NLT)

‘You can make many plans, but the Lord ’s purpose will prevail.’ Proverbs 19:21(NLT)

Do you want to add something into your marriage, like a regular date night? Or do you want to remove something, like bickering? Whatever the change you want to see, you can be certain that when it is something that will build your marriage, God is on board with it. When you invite Him to help build your marriage, He will meet you with the desire and the power to work toward His plans! Seek His purposes in your marriage and life today, rather than your own plans. 

Prayer 

Thank you, God, that marriage was your idea. I pray that you will give me the “desire and the power to do what pleases you” in my life and my marriage; that you will grow our marriage into the image of oneness that you have in mind. I pray that you will grow my perspective of you so that I can see that You are truly greater and more wonderful than I imagine. Amen. 

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‘Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.’ Psalms 90:12(NLT)

‘If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. ‘ James 1:5(NLT)

Imagine the future of your marriage. What are your hopes for the later years of life? Have you ever seen a couple that inspired you? What were some of the qualities that made them stand out? Think about which of those qualities you can add in to your marriage. It may be a character trait that God will grow as you seek Him diligently, or a habit you two can build into your life together. James tells us that God is generous in giving wisdom when we ask. Living together wisely is a gift to your marriage, family and community. How will you live now, in such a way that you grow old together? 

Prayer

God, thank you that you know every hair on my head, and every thought in my mind. Today, I praise you that you give wisdom to all who ask. I pray you will teach me to understand how to live wisely and well. 

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‘Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. ‘ 2 Corinthians 12:9(NLT)

What kind of husband / wife did you imagine you would be? What are some elements of life you envisioned for your life together with your spouse? It may be as simple as greeting your spouse a sweet kiss instead of a distracted hello when you see each other at the end of the day, or occasionally surprising them with a favorite treat. It is easy to imagine what life could be like with your beloved, but once the distractions and busyness of life settle in, those good intentions can easily fall by the wayside. Even though our actions aren’t always in line with the person we wish to be, God is always calling us toward Him. In your failures His power is all the more evident. His ways are better than ours, and always lead to life and godliness. How might He be inviting you to actively become the person you want to be? His vision for you, and for your marriage, surpasses what you can dream up for yourself! Choose one thing you wished your marriage would have, and incorporate that into your real life with your spouse.  

Prayer

Lord, You created my spouse, and know their heart’s desires. Today I ask that you will inspire me with one thing I can do, right here in the middle of my real life, that will bring a spark of joy to my spouse and marriage. Thank you God, that you desire good things for us. Amen. 

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‘Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him. In this new life, it doesn’t matter if you are a Jew or a Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbaric, uncivilized, slave, or free. Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us. Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. ‘ Colossians 3:10-12(NLT)

This scripture contains very active commands: It calls us to “put on love,” and to “clothe” ourselves in the character of Christ. For all who have trusted Christ for salvation, He gives His spirit, who works inside of us to make us more like Christ. The character qualities listed in this passage are all things God desires to grow in us, but in order to see that growth, we also must desire this! Ask God to align your heart with His and to grow you to be more like Him today. 

Prayer

God, your character is holy and blameless; full of mercy and love. Today, will you make me more like you, and fill me with the fruits of your Spirit? I pray you will help me to be humble enough to ask for your help. Help me to see how to “put on the new nature,” and be tenderhearted, merciful, kind, humble, gentle and patient in my marriage. Amen. 

from Reconnect: Refresh Your Marriage

‘Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. ‘ Hebrews 12:15(NLT)

‘Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. ‘ Colossians 3:13(NLT)

‘“No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!#18:22 Or seventy-seven times.’ Matthew 18:22(NLT)

Forgiveness is essential in marriage. Not once or twice, but as Jesus said, “seventy times seven.” A thriving marriage is not possible without forgiveness! Today, consider whether you may be carrying any unforgiveness toward your spouse. Remember that in Christ, God has fully forgiven you. Ask Him to help you understand His forgiveness for you anew today. Ask God to search your heart for anything you have been holding on to. Then take five minutes to sit quietly and sift through what goes through your mind. If there is anything that needs to be attended to, ask God to help you forgive as He has forgiven you. 

Prayer

God, you are the ultimate forgiver. I praise you for your sacrificial love, which enables me to also forgive others! I ask today that you will continue to search my heart and show me any hint of bitterness hidden there. Help me to forgive completely any past offenses I am holding on to, and live free from all bitterness. 

from Reconnect: Refresh Your Marriage

‘Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. ‘ Hebrews 12:14-15(NLT)

Some conflicts in marriage must be resolved. Other things, however, are matters of opinion or preference. With these things, we can choose to take the conflict off the table, or decide together to set the issue aside until we pick a calm time to talk about it. Today’s verse admonishes us to “work at living in peace.” It is a helpful reminder that peaceful living isn’t effortless, but it is worth the work!  Is there anything creating unnecessary conflict in your marriage that you could put away? What is one area of conflict that you can set aside today, in order to find rest in your marriage? 

Prayer

Thank you, God, that your Spirit is at work in my heart. Thank you that you give your Spirit to everyone who believes in you. I pray today that you will grow me in the desire for peace. Show me any areas where I am creating unnecessary conflict or tension in my marriage. Help me to freely forgive and give grace. 

from Reconnect: Refresh Your Marriage

‘Then Jesus said, “Let’s go off by ourselves to a quiet place and rest awhile.” He said this because there were so many people coming and going that Jesus and his apostles didn’t even have time to eat.’ Mark 6:31(NLT)

‘It is like a mustard seed planted in the ground. It is the smallest of all seeds, but it becomes the largest of all garden plants; it grows long branches, and birds can make nests in its shade.” Jesus used many similar stories and illustrations to teach the people as much as they could understand. In fact, in his public ministry he never taught without using parables; but afterward, when he was alone with his disciples, he explained everything to them.
Jesus Calms the Storm
As evening came, Jesus said to his disciples, “Let’s cross to the other side of the lake.” ‘ Mark 4:31-35(NLT)

Jesus did everything God had planned for him on earth. And he did it all without hurry, anxiety, or worry. We see through the Gospels that He always made time for people, and had compassion on them. Yet, He had the habit of resting — He even napped on a boat in the middle of a huge storm! He lived in the peace of knowing God is completely in control of everything. Jesus calls us to his restful way of living. We can follow by setting aside time for rest and refreshment, trusting that the world is safe in His hands. Today, set a timer for five minutes and sit in a state of restful quiet with no agenda.

Prayer: 

Jesus, thank you that you lived a perfect life, free from sin and shortcomings. Your compassionate example inspires me. Help me to quiet my mind, and adopt rest into my life. I pray you will show me how to live more like you lived, trusting God totally.  

Go deeper: Read Mark 4:31-35 for the account of Jesus napping through the storm. 

from Reconnect: Refresh Your Marriage

‘And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.’ Colossians 3:15(NLT)

‘“You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.’ Matthew 7:9-11(NLT)

Today, start by meditating on Colossians 3:15 again. Don’t just read over it; let the words sink into your heart and mind. This time we will focus on the last sentence – “always be thankful.” Gratitude can change our whole outlook on life. Begin to think of things you are grateful for, and thank God for each one. Our second scripture, from Matthew 7, reminds us that God is a kind father to His children, who loves to give us good gifts. Think about the idea that your spouse is a gift from God to you, and thank Him for that gift. Pay attention to how gratitude impacts your thoughts toward them. 

Prayer

Heavenly Father, thank you for providing me with a spouse. Help me to see them as a gift from your hands. Help me to view them as your beloved child. Thank you, God, that you are a kind father, who gives good gifts. 

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