Tag: Happy Marriage

‘Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. ‘ Colossians 3:12-14(NLT)

Today’s scripture perfectly describes a Happy Home. Is there a place you can go that has compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience emanating from the people within? What about when you do have a complaint against each other? Is it handled quickly and forgiven? 

Picture a house. You are on the outside. It is faded and no lights are on inside. Now imagine as you read these verses, that with each attribute described, a light begins to glow from within. A compassionate heart turns the light on. From behind the curtains, the house begins to glow. Next, the kindness light comes on and the inside glow becomes brighter. Humility notches up the brightness even more. Now the house looks warm and inviting. 

From across the street, you notice that meekness turns on the front porch lanterns. Patience kicks on the landscape lighting, and you notice that the house does not seem as faded, but instead, bright and inviting. Last you see silhouettes through the curtains, a couple embrace…arms extended to enfold two small children. That is the love that binds that faded, old house in perfect harmony. Is this a picture of your home? 

Today, ask the Lord to guide and light your path in establishing a Colossians 3 home.

from Happy Marriage, Happy Home

‘For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body. As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” ‘ Ephesians 5:25-31(NLT)

God modeled human marriage after the relationship Christ has with us. Marriage is an illustration of the way God loves us—being totally committed to us, forgiving us, making us holy, spotless, and righteous through His sacrifice. 

On their wedding day, a bride and groom look as radiant and perfect as they ever will. The groom is perfectly attired and awaits his bride’s entrance with great hope and great desire. The bride is flawlessly coiffed. She shines with adoration and expectancy. She is even becoming a different legal entity: her name will change. 

However, after the name change and after the honeymoon, the couple will not appear as flawless to one another. So how can two imperfect people maintain the radiance? The Apostle Paul tells us how: the husband must cleanse his bride with the washing of the Word, so she can maintain the holy and blameless position of her wedding day. It is only through the Word of God that we enrich our understanding of God. As the husband and wife read the Bible together, the transforming power of the Holy Spirit will increase the Christ-likeness in both people. As each reflects Christ to the other, the radiance and beauty of Jesus will shine through, and the commitment, forgiveness, holiness, and righteousness will inspire many, many more honeymoons. 

Pray for the intentional washing of the Word together and extended honeymoons inspired by sacrificial love for each other.

from Happy Marriage, Happy Home

‘For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body. As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” ‘ Ephesians 5:25-31(NLT)

Husbands, love your wives. If I were sending an old fashioned telegram, this is where I would say, “Stop.” You don’t have to be a Bible scholar to get this. It is all about L-O-V-E. Husbands, that is your job. 

Now here is where it gets tricky. In the Greek, the verb love is in present tense, which means it is a continuous action. Before I lose you guys, let me translate: You have to keep showing her love. Christ came into this world with intention and purpose – to show us His love. He came to sacrifice. His actions and His words demonstrated His sacrificial love. You must be intentional and purposeful or YOU WILL MISS THE MARK. 

Scripture sets the example, because dealing with the opposite sex can be tricky. We are created differently. Therefore, if a man follows the Apostle Paul’s example, “Love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her,” he will be connecting with her on the right level. Go for it guys, and be prepared to be amazed! 

Pray today for intentional and purposeful demonstrations of love in your marriage.

from Happy Marriage, Happy Home

‘A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.’ Proverbs 15:1(NLT)

Nobel Peace Prize nominee Carl Rogers was a leading psychologist of the twentieth century. He is known for his therapeutic technique called unconditional positive regard. Basically, he believed that individuals come into a counseling office with all kinds of emotional and spiritual hurts. The one thing each and every person needs is for someone to give total empathy – or unconditional positive regard. 

I believe this is a wonderful tool for marriage. Your spouse is the one person who should offer you unconditional openness and positive and authentic empathy. Empathy is a word that is often confused with sympathy. However, the term is very different from having pity on someone. Empathy is the ability to come alongside another in a certain situation as if it were your own. Webster’s Dictionary defines empathy as “vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another.” 

Jo Beth demonstrates this in our marriage and in our family. She comes alongside me and takes on my issues as her own. When I have been hurt, she hurts. When I have a success, she is ecstatic. When I need to vent, she is the ear that I seek, hands down! Over the years, we have grown into each other’s best counselor. Second only to the Lord, it is her gentle answer and gentle listening I seek most. 

By the way, Carl Rogers was not nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize in psychology. Instead, his nomination was for his efforts to bring peace to the peoples of South Africa and Northern Ireland. His theory, much like our scripture today, was one of peace. 

Ask God, through His Holy Spirit to give you unconditional positive regard for your spouse.

from Happy Marriage, Happy Home

‘Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.’ Ephesians 4:32(NLT)

Do you want the secret to a Happy Home? Then you need to follow one verse: “Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” This one command is the single most important verse regarding marriage and the home. 

I knew a godly man who had been married over fifty years, which at the time seemed like an eternity to me. The interesting thing was the joy, exuberance, and sweet flirtation I always observed in his marriage. I have never forgotten something he practiced. Each morning, he rose very early to go to work. He would fix the coffee pot and leave a china cup out for his wife, as opposed to his old mug. However, the thing that really stuck with me is that he would leave a little love note underneath her cup and saucer. He would tear a piece of paper towel, a part of an envelope, a newspaper coupon, or whatever was handy and jot a few loving words down for her eyes only. 

Her first encounter every morning was a love note. Nothing poetic, simply short, sweet, and true words! “You are my sweetheart.” “I love you.” “You are beautiful.” “Have a great day, Love.” “It’s rainy today, but you are my sunshine!” And so it went. Little thoughts, little gestures…HUGE results. 

Do you want your marriage to sizzle and to last? Be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving. 

Ask the Lord for His creativity in being kind, tenderhearted, and romantic to each other, and pray for an attitude of forgiveness, as you have been forgiven.

from Happy Marriage, Happy Home

‘Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, “I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life.”’ John 8:12(NLT)

Yesterday, I told you about an inspiring commercial advertising a vacation destination. I described the opening words about hospitality and the visual of happy people frolicking in the sun. At the very end of the commercial, additional words got me to thinking again about the impact of establishing an inviting destination for your family at home. The announcer returns to say with dramatic emphasis, “To truly experience the light that is our destination, you must experience it for yourself. It emanates from our hearts. It is visible everywhere. It changes everything it touches. It will change you. The light of the Caribbean is calling.” 

Again, it struck me. Our home is light-filled. I don’t mean we have a lamp on in every room. I mean it is Christ-centered and emanates the true Light of the World. Our sons have grown and left our house, but I still run into their childhood friends every now and then. Often, one will bring up a funny story about hanging out at our house when they were young. Every now and then, someone will say that they enjoyed being there because it was so different from the strife-filled home in which they lived. 

This breaks my heart. 

We don’t have the perfect family or the perfect home, but what we do have is The Light. It emanates from our hearts and is visible everywhere. It changes everything it touches, and it will change you. The light that is calling is Jesus. Is He the light in your home? 

Pray for Jesus to be the light emanating from your heart and your home. Invite Him in and see how much your home will change.

from Happy Marriage, Happy Home