Tag: Focus Matters In Marriage

‘In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross.’ Colossians 2:15(NLT)

Prayer is critical for implementing spiritual truths in your life and in your marriage relationship. Let’s spend today’s reading entry praying for greater trust, rest and focus on God’s perspective over our own.

Opening Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father, We praise You for Your great might and for Your victory over our enemy, Satan, and his demons (Colossians 2:15). It is in that victory which we find our own confidence to live, work and move forward in the purposes for which You have called us as a couple. It is in Your love that we are able to know what it means to cherish the love of each other. When our eyes are on You, we are set free to experience and enjoy the gifts and grace found within our spouse. We are set free to overlook unmet expectations as we rest in the knowledge of Your control and providential mercies.

Presenting the Situation

Use this portion of your time to direct your thoughts to specific areas in your marriage where distractions or worries may interfere with the confident peace and assurance which comes from faith in God. You may want to spend time writing out a diary of how you and your spouse spend your time and on what you focus your thoughts. 

Then take a moment to place these before God in prayer, asking Him for wisdom on which things remove your focus from what He has for you to do, or to be. Sometimes the things Satan uses to distract us do not seem overtly evil and so we maintain their presence in our lives longer than we should. But anything that siphons your attention off of God’s presence and purpose for you as a couple should be examined as to its true worth.

Closing Prayer for Greater Focus 

“Gracious Lord, life has a way of interfering in our thoughts and our focus, distracting us from what matters most. We come before you as a couple and pray that in our marriage, you will help us to stay focused on You and Your values and Your calling for our lives. Part of that focus is in living out our relationship together embodying the character of Christ to each other. Help us to stay attentive to the need for this character in how we address each other and serve each other. 

Another part of that focus entails facing spiritual warfare from the perspective of victory rather than defeat, knowing that You are seated in the heavenlies above all rule, power and authority and that through Jesus Christ’s death and resurrection, we are also seated with You. Give us insight and wisdom on the decisions we make as a couple that will reflect a long-term, eternal focus rather than a short-term, material mindset. And reveal to us throughout the moments of our days the blessing and peace that comes through keeping our thoughts set on You. 

When our focus center on You, worry and anxiety cannot keep us from embracing our relationship fully. Set us free to fully live out the blessings of our marriage by keeping our focus on You and the wisdom, comfort and assurances we find in Your truth. In Christ’s name, amen.” 

from Focus Matters In Marriage by Bruce Wilkinson & Heather Hair

‘You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!’ Isaiah 26:3(NLT)

Our spiritual lives reflect the reality of the need for focus in many ways. This holds especially true with regard to marriage – a relationship that faces multiple levels of stress on a regular basis. When a couple is weighed down with the cumbersome need to control everything themselves … adjust every angle, move every light, lift every chin, pose every moment, they miss out on the ability to do much at all. They get stranded in the minutia while missing the miracle of marriage itself.

When our focus is on the temporal details of life, rather than on God, we spend the bulk of our time dictating our distractions instead of dwelling on our destinies. We willingly enslave ourselves to the tyranny of the urgent. We forget the value of a moment, a word, a look, hug, or even a shared meal. 

Marriages fall prey to frenzy rather than peace due to a lack of perspective which keeps God as the Sovereign, in control of all, and resting in the truth of His Word. God tells us that when we focus on Him, peace presides. “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you,” Isaiah 26:3. 

If you long for more moments, more peace, more memories in your marriage, focus on God. Let Him figure out the details and blur out the backgrounds. As you do, you will discover the tremendous beauty right before your very eyes.

A Prayer for Focus

“Heavenly Father, You are seated above all and Your rule is carried out over all (Psalm 115:3). We honor Your position as supreme authority. Through Christ, the world was created and in Christ all things are held together (Colossians 1:16). You hold things in place and by Your plans, a matter is established. We give You praise and thanksgiving for the power which is Yours, knowing that it is this power which enables us to live out our days. It is Your divine wisdom and authority which has positioned us on earth to carry out the plans You have for us. And in Your wisdom, You have brought us together as a couple knowing that we can accomplish more for Your glory in this way. Help us to rest in this truth as a couple so we can experience more of Your leading, provision and power in our home. In Christ’s name, amen.”

from Focus Matters In Marriage by Bruce Wilkinson & Heather Hair

‘Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. ‘ Colossians 3:2(NLT)

There existed a time when the only way to get professional-looking photographs required hiring a professional photographer. Family portraits took place once a year, if that. Families often waited until the local church brought in a photographer for the church’s membership catalog. Then time slots were chosen, outfits were purchased and families made their way to pose for the camera. A few weeks later, the photographer placed different package options in front of each family to be considered and chosen for purchase. Purchase at a pretty steep price, mind you.

Today; however, professional-looking photographs often require little more than your, or a friend’s, smartphone. The resolution quality, along with the camera’s pre-programmed abilities to isolate the position of focus can make the average person’s pictures look like portraits. In fact, one smartphone even offers “portrait” mode to give the additional effect of blurring the background while sharpening the person or object of choice. 

Focus matters. 

What the professional photographer understood to do with the various buttons, lenses and lighting options necessary to operate the equipment from days gone by, smartphones now enable pretty much everyone to do simply by aiming in the right direction. 

The ease of this focus has allowed families to have portraits made much more frequently than before, not to mention much more cheaply. It’s allowed for not just a roll of film, or two rolls, to capture a vacation but rather hundreds, if not thousands, of photos to catch and share these memories. It’s also allowed parents to have more than the yearly portrait of the littles as they grow, but rather a daily timeline of growth, joys, activities and sweet-sayings caught on film. Yes, live-photos now add video and audio to a photo as well. This enables all of us to seize segments of our seconds at random, simply for our sentimental remembrance.

The bottom line: We’re able to do more when we’re able to focus well. 

The same holds true for marriage. When you as a couple follow the principle set for us in Colossians 3:2 about setting your eyes on God and living with an eternal perspective, you will experience a greater depth of love in your marriage. Let’s explore more on how that works in tomorrow’s reading plan entry. 

from Focus Matters In Marriage by Bruce Wilkinson & Heather Hair