Marriage Devotional

‘Pride goes before destruction, and haughtiness before a fall.’ Proverbs 16:18(NLT)

Pride is the soil where all other sin takes root.

Pride, on the surface, seems like a “harmless” sin. In fact, we often don’t even think of it as a sin, but it is dangerous indeed. Pride is the primary cause of divorce. Pride is the whisper in our ear that seduces us into believing that our way is always the best way and being “right” is more important than being loving. Pride is the enemy of love. Choose humility instead. Humility doesn’t mean you lack confidence or courage; it simply means you’re led by love instead of selfishness.

Reflection: Would my spouse consider me to be filled with pride or filled with humility?

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‘For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord . “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. ‘ Jeremiah 29:11(NLT)

God’s timing is almost always different than our own timing, but His plans always prove to be perfect.

We all have our own ideas and agendas, and we tend to get frustrated when our plans don’t work out the ways we want. In those moments when doors don’t seem to be opening fast enough or when you and your spouse feel frustrated that your plans aren’t happening like you thought they would, remember that God is with you and His plans for your life and your marriage are better than your own. Trust Him and praise Him even in moments of disappointment. He knows what He’s doing.

Reflection: Are we trusting in God’s timing or are we trying to force our own agenda?

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‘Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.’ 1 Thessalonians 5:18(NLT)

Choose an attitude of gratitude every day.

It’s not happy people who are thankful; it’s thankful people who are happy. Choose to say “Thank you” to your spouse for all he/she does and always remember to say “Thank you” to your Savior for all He has done. Let gratitude replace grumbling in your marriage. The next time you feel like complaining about your boss, stop and give thanks that you have a job. The next time you feel like complaining about a messy house, pause and give thanks that you have a family instead of a clean-but-empty house. Give thanks for everything.

Reflection: How would my marriage look differently if I spent less time complaining and more time giving thanks?

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‘And do everything with love.’ 1 Corinthians 16:14(NLT)

A strong marriage requires two people who choose to love each other even on days when they struggle to like each other!

Many modern love stories would have us naively believe that love is little more than a fickle feeling that comes and goes. The truth is that love isn’t a feeling; it’s an action-oriented commitment. It’s a choice to give your best to someone even when they are at their worst. It means serving someone even when they are in no position to repay. It means giving more grace that we feel like giving. That’s what Christ did for us and what He calls us to do for each other.

Reflection: Am I showing my spouse “love” by God’s definition of love or by the world’s definition?

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‘Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon.’ Philippians 4:5(NLT)

Thoughtfulness is a source of fuel that keeps a marriage going strong.

You don’t need a lot of money or any special set of skills to be thoughtful and considerate towards each other. Don’t let selfishness or pride distract you from consistently putting the needs of your spouse ahead of your own. When a marriage has both spouses intentionally being considerate and showing thoughtfulness to each other, the marriage will thrive. Make sure your spouse knows that he/she is always on your mind.

Reflection: Am I consistently thoughtful and considerate towards my spouse?

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‘Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! ‘ Philippians 4:4(NLT)

Let laughter fill the soundtrack of your marriage!

Even in seasons of struggles and pain, strong couples make it a priority to laugh together. They’ve learned that while they won’t always “feel” happy, they can always have a joy that transcends the circumstances. Choosing to laugh together isn’t being blind towards the difficulties. Rather, it’s a faith-filled declaration that, “We will get through this! Nothing can steal our joy. Because of Christ, all our pain is temporary and all our joy will be eternal!”

Reflection: Do we laugh because of temporary circumstances or because of permanent joy?

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‘Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.’ Romans 12:2(NLT)

The happiest couples are a little “weird,” because they’ve learned that “normal” isn’t working.

What our world calls “normal” when it comes to marriage is actually unhealthy. When we look around at our culture, it’s apparently normal for a couple to be unhappy, disconnected and eventually divorced. If you want your marriage to be healthy and happy, you must be countercultural at times. Be willing to do things others don’t seem willing to do. Base your value system on God’s timeless truths instead of the world’s fickle trends.

Reflection: What habits to healthy couples embody that stand out as different or maybe even “weird”?

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‘Catch all the foxes, those little foxes, before they ruin the vineyard of love, for the grapevines are blossoming!’ Song of Songs 2:15(NLT)

The little things in marriage can make a big difference!

Small acts of thoughtfulness done with great consistency can make a massive positive impact in a marriage. Conversely, seemingly-small negative actions or habits can erode intimacy and eventually stifle a marriage altogether. Watch out for those “little foxes” that seem relatively harmless. Don’t let them weasel their way into your home. Protect your marriage from negative thoughts, negative influences, negative habits or negativity in any size or form.

Reflection: What are the “little foxes” that are stealthily causing damage in our marriage and how can we get rid of them?

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‘Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. ‘ Romans 12:15(NLT)

Celebrate together in the good times and lean on each other in the hard times.

Marriage is “for better or for worse.” Your marriage will experience both extremes. When your spouse is happy, you should be the first to share in the celebration. When your spouse is sad or even heartbroken, you should be there for support. In those moments of pain your spouse won’t need you to cheer them up or to offer advice. Simply be there. Hold each other. Pray together. Cry together. These moments of shared pain will become some of your most intimate shared memories. Reflection: How can I better celebrate with my spouse in good times and better support my spouse in difficult times?

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‘Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. ‘ Romans 12:10(NLT)

Treat your spouse like a priority; not like an interruption.

Never take your spouse for granted. Make sure he/she knows that you value your marriage more than any other part of your schedule. You can show your spouse the place of priority he/she always holds in your heart by simply answering the phone whenever he/she calls, always being thoughtful, and remembering that you’re never too busy to be thoughtful and respectful to each other.

Reflection: Do my words and my actions consistently communicate that my spouse is a top priority?

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