Marriage Devotional

‘Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.’ Proverbs 29:11(NLT)

Choices made in anger lead to regrets.

Anger is a natural human emotion. We all feel it, so the Bible never says that anger itself is a sin. Anger, however, can easily lead us into sin. We tend to make our worst choices when we’re responding in anger. If you are quick to anger, you should pray and ask God to reveal the root causes that are robbing you of joy. You should also be very careful not to allow your anger to control you, because it could also sabotage your marriage.

Reflection: Do I make my choices in anger or do I make my choices with wisdom?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘Don’t wear yourself out trying to get rich. Be wise enough to know when to quit.’ Proverbs 23:4(NLT)

Your family can do with less of almost everything if it means having more of you.

The Bible clearly calls us to hard work and to a sacred duty of providing for our families, but in our culture the sin of laziness doesn’t seem to be nearly as common as the sin of overworking. If you are too busy to consistently spend quality time with your family, then you need to immediately re-examine your priorities. On your deathbed, your faith and your family will be all that matters to you, so please don’t wait until then to make them a bigger priority than your work.

Reflection: Am I consistently showing my spouse and family that I love and value them above my pursuits and possessions?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his foolishness.’ Proverbs 26:11(NLT)

Your mistakes don’t define your character. It’s what you choose to do after you’ve made the mistake that makes all the difference.

If we make a poor choice once, it’s a “mistake.” If we make the same poor choice again, it’s a deliberate and destructive decision. Are there choices you are consistently making that are harming your marriage? Are there habits that need to stop? Are there words that need to cease? Don’t get stuck on autopilot and continue to make decisions that need to stop. Anything left on autopilot will eventually crash. Examine your choices and stop repeating the bad ones.

Reflection: Am I repeating any negative behaviors that need to stop once and for all?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘Kind words are like honey— sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.’ Proverbs 16:24(NLT)

The tone of your words will shape the tone of your marriage.

Think about the tone of your words when you are talking to your spouse. Are you rushed and annoyed or are your tender and thoughtful in your replies? One of the most powerful (and tragically underused) pieces of marriage advice is to simply be nice to each other. There’s never a good excuse to be unkind to your spouse. Kindness is contagious; but unfortunately, so is rudeness. Make sure you’re spreading the right one.

Reflection: Am I creating a climate of kindness or of rudeness in my marriage?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. ‘ James 1:19(NLT)

The best spouses are good communicators and the best communicators are good listeners.

Listening is the most effective form of communication. Most of us listen only to form our response instead of listening to fully understand what the other is saying. When your spouse is talking, put down the distractions and give your undivided attention. Taking the time to listen with undivided focus and wholehearted compassion communicates much more than your words ever could.

Reflection: Would my spouse consider me to be a good listener?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. ‘ Romans 12:17(NLT)

Don’t treat your spouse the way your spouse treats you. Treat your spouse the way God treats you.

There’s a natural tendency to want to “keep score” in marriage. We want credit for all our good deeds and we want payback for any wrongs our spouse might have committed towards. The problem with keeping score in marriage is that both spouses always lose. God gave us His best while we were at our worst, and He calls us to love each other in His perfect example of love. Give your best even when your spouse is at his/her worst. People need love most when they deserve it least.

Reflection: Do I freely give my spouse the love and grace that God has freely given me?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. ‘ Philippians 4:6(NLT)

Worry occupies the part of your heart where faith should live.

All of us are prone to worrying sometimes, but worries can unravel the peace of your home and the unity of your marriage. Worrying gives us the illusion of control over situations that feel out-of-control, but God never called us to control our circumstances. He calls us to trust Him with our circumstances. The next time you and your spouse are tempted to worry, try praying together instead. God sometimes uses our prayers to change our circumstances, but He always uses our prayers to change our perspective.

Reflection: How would our marriage improve if we worried less and prayed more?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.’ Romans 12:18(NLT)

Strive to be a peacemaker; not a pot-stirrer!

Unity in marriage doesn’t mean uniformity. You won’t always agree, but should always be agreeable towards each other. Even in moments of disagreement, don’t look for ways to stir up conflict or belittle each other’s opinions. Instead, work together with mutual respect to bring peace to every conflict. Be quick to apologize when you’ve hurt your spouse’s feelings. Work together to create an oasis of peace in your home. Make your relationship a place you want to escape to and not a place you want to escape from.

Reflection: Am I creating peace or creating conflict in my marriage?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.’ Matthew 7:12(NLT)

Treat your spouse the way you want to be treated.

We learn the “Golden Rule” as small children, but too often, we don’t apply this timeless truth in the one relationship that should matter most. Always treat your spouse with thoughtfulness, respect, kindness and encouragement. Treat him/her the way you want to be treated. This doesn’t mean that you should assume your spouse’s needs and desires are the same as yours. Be more focused on his/her needs than you are on your own needs.

Reflection: Do I consistently treat my spouse the way I want to be treated?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage

‘“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? ‘ Matthew 7:3(NLT)

Celebrate your spouse’s strengths instead of pointing out weaknesses.

When we focus on something, it starts to seem bigger. If you choose to focus on your spouse’s strengths, they’ll seem even bigger, but if you focus only on weaknesses and flaws, you’ll see them even when they aren’t really there. If you must focus on flaws, always start with your own flaws. You are the only part of the marriage that you truly have the power to change. Always be willing to build up your spouse instead of looking for ways to tear him/her down.

Reflection: Am I better at celebrating my spouse’s strengths or at pointing out his/her weaknesses?

from 31 Days To A Stronger Marriage