Marriage Devotional

‘Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. ‘ Colossians 3:12-13(NLT)

‘Yes, this was their unanimous decision. They signed a treaty as allies against you—’ Psalms 83:5(NLT)

‘Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!’ Matthew 18:21-22(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

Have you ever wondered why the hardest people to forgive are sometimes the ones we love the most? Maybe it’s because we let our guard down with them and become very vulnerable. Maybe it’s because we don’t want to give them a chance to hurt us again. The paradox is that even though we know that the possibility of reconciliation will never happen without forgiveness (which is usually what we truly desire), we hold on to our unforgiveness. 

So what about your marriage? Is there something you are holding on to that is limiting your marriage? Is it keeping you from embracing all God has for your marriage? If there is, maybe today is the day to forgive. If you’re not currently withholding forgiveness from your spouse, focus on keeping a heart of forgiveness for your spouse. It really goes back to God asking us to forgive—He has forgiven more than any of us can ever imagine. He is our model of what forgiveness is all about.

Today’s One Thing: If you have any unforgiveness toward your spouse, begin the process of forgiveness today! 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Fathers can give their sons an inheritance of houses and wealth, but only the Lord can give an understanding wife.’ Proverbs 19:14(NLT)

‘You can make many plans, but the Lord ’s purpose will prevail.’ Proverbs 19:21(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

Do you see your spouse as a gift from God? When Nancy and I look back over our story together, it is easy to see God’s hand all over our relationship. It starts with both of us ending up at a college that was not on either of our radars until the last minute. It continues with two friends who thought Nancy and I needed to meet. Our story still amazes me and also helps me see that Nancy really has always been a gift from God to me. He knew the kind of wife I needed and the kind of husband she needed. 

The longer we are together, the more we see the plan unfold. I know there have been (and still are) times when I’ve taken her for granted, but I always come back to the truth that God designed a gift that has been perfect for me. What about you and your spouse? Can you backtrack and see how God brought the two of you together? Can you see how perfect you are for each other when you embrace your differences? Can you see your spouse as a gift from God?

Today’s One Thing: Thank God for the gift of your spouse today! 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Never let loyalty and kindness leave you! Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart. Then you will find favor with both God and people, and you will earn a good reputation.’ Proverbs 3:3-4(NLT)

‘But ‘God made them male and female’ from the beginning of creation. ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”’ Mark 10:6-9(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

What does “fighting for your marriage” mean to you? Maybe you’ve never really thought about it, or maybe you think it sounds like a lot of work! For me, fighting for my marriage starts with a solid foundation with three parts: Nancy, me, and God. It is the three of us working together for an Awesome Marriage. This picture keeps my perspective right. 

The three of us can stand together against anything that would come against our marriage. Together we fight a culture that does more harm than good to mariages. We fight temptations that could wreck our marriage if we gave in to them. We build and strengthen our marriage through actions and activities that connect us, such as praying together, worshiping together, reading the Bible together, having date nights, spending quality time together each day, and making time for sex. 

I look at it this way: If we do not purposefully fight for our marriage, we run the risk of settling for a marriage that is far from God’s incredible design. Now it’s your turn. If you are not fighting for your marriage, commit to start today! 

Today’s One Thing: Together choose to fight for your marriage by _____________ every day! 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.’ Philippians 2:3-4(NLT)

‘For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind. But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. ‘ James 3:16-17(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

Today’s “One Thing” question is for me: How have you been selfish in your marriage this past week? Ugh! I hate that question because it always nails me. Selfishness is my greatest fault. It freaks me out that I see the results of selfishness every day in the counseling room and still know it is my number one issue. I know all the right answers. I know by putting everything in God’s hands, I can walk away from selfishness. There are days, sometimes weeks, when I do that well. I’ll be rocking along really well, but then I seem to put my guard down and do a 180 that removes God from first place in my life and puts me in His place. 

I wish it only affected me—that would be easier for me to take. But it doesn’t just affect me. You see, when I move God out of first place, I move Nancy out of second place, and it affects my marriage big-time. Then it trickles down to other areas of my life. Have I been selfish in my marriage this past week? Yes. Am I giving up? No. With God’s help, I will remove my selfishness and put Him back in first and Nancy back in second. It is the only way it works!

Today’s One Thing: If you have been selfish in your marriage this week, what do you need to do today? 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. ‘ Romans 12:10(NLT)

‘But on the judgment day, fire will reveal what kind of work each builder has done. The fire will show if a person’s work has any value. ‘ 1 Corinthians 3:13(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

What is the most romantic thing your spouse has ever done for you? A couple of things come to my mind when I think about my own marriage. Nancy and I had been married about three years and had lived in apartments the whole time. We were driving around one afternoon and literally stumbled into a new addition of homes that seemed to fit our price range. We looked at five show homes, but none of them seemed to fit us. As we talked to the builder, he said, “Why don’t you let me build the house for you that you want?” We had heard horror stories about couples building houses, but we said yes. We were determined to make this a great experience. 

As I was getting ready to leave work one evening, Nancy called and asked me to meet her at the new house. There was only the concrete slab, but on that slab Nancy had a tablecloth, candles, and a great picnic dinner. It was so romantic to me because I saw her being purposeful about making this a great experience. 

Another romantic thing Nancy does for me is when we go on trips for just the two of us, she always buys a new nightgown for the trip—just for me. Now that you have had a couple of minutes to think, what is the most romantic thing your spouse has ever done for you?

Today’s One Thing: Share with your spouse that “most romantic thing” they have ever done for you!

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. ‘ Ephesians 4:2-3(NLT)

‘Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. ‘ Colossians 3:14(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

When our kids were still at home, there were times when discipline was necessary. Time-outs were an invaluable disciplinary strategy that worked really well with both of our kids. The time-out slowed things down, gave everyone a chance to think things over, and then set the stage for getting things back on track. Usually, especially as the kids got older, the time-out was spent in their room. 

A few weeks ago, I thought Nancy and I needed a time-out—not to be disciplined, but to slow things down a little. The day had been hectic, with no relief in sight, and we had not had a chance to connect. We needed to have some time alone with the rest of the world blocked out. 

Like us, you and your spouse may benefit from a couples time-out every now and then. It may just be ten or fifteen minutes, but it can make a difference in your relationship. If your home is full of people, you can take a short time-out in your bedroom or a closet if you have to! I know a husband and wife who take their ten-minute time-outs in their pantry, mainly because no one in the family has figured out their spot—yet. Now, what you do with the time-out is totally up to the two of you!

Today’s One Thing: Take a ten-minute time-out with your spouse today! 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Your eternal word, O Lord , stands firm in heaven.’ Psalms 119:89(NLT)

‘Hear my prayer, O Lord ; listen to my plea! Answer me because you are faithful and righteous.’ Psalms 143:1(NLT)

‘Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you.’ Psalms 143:8(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

A number of years ago, Nancy went through a rough time. She was depressed and was not sleeping—I mean, really not sleeping. Night after night she would lie awake and then totally crash for a day or so. The pattern was horrible, and her lack of sleep did nothing to help her depression. We consulted doctors, tried medications, and finally came to the point that we were willing to try anything to help her sleep. 

During this time, almost from the first day, I prayed for my wife. I prayed for God to lift the depression and to give her sleep at night. Each morning as I awoke, I could hardly wait to open my eyes and see her in a restful sleep. Yet, each morning I saw her eyes wide open after another sleepless night. 

The pattern continued for a couple of months and was wearing hard on both of us. But then the miracle happened. Over the course of a week, we consulted with a new doctor who had a new plan, and I finally awoke one morning to a sleeping wife. As I look back, two things stand out: First, God answered our prayer. Second, during that two-month period, Nancy and I grew in our love for each other in ways I could never have imagined. Even when I felt God was not at work, He was. Whatever you are praying for in your marriage, don’t give up. God is at work! 

Today’s One Thing: Ask God to help you see clearly what He wants for your marriage. 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth. She is a loving deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you always. May you always be captivated by her love.’ Proverbs 5:18-19(NLT)

‘Your love delights me, my treasure, my bride. Your love is better than wine, your perfume more fragrant than spices.’ Song of Songs 4:10(NLT)

‘Before I realized it, my strong desires had taken me to the chariot of a noble man.’ Song of Songs 6:12(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

Do you make time for sex in your marriage? For some of you, the answer may be a resounding yes. My counseling experience tells me that most people would say no or “sometimes.” Sex in marriage is a gift from God (see Song of Solomon). It is not the most important thing in marriage, but next to growing together in Christ, it needs to be as important as everything else. It draws us close. It is intimacy at its best. It is unique because the two of you are unique. 

Sex in marriage tends to get put on the back-burner when life gets in the way. We get busy with kids, work, housework, volunteer work, and ______________ (you fill in the blank). When we neglect intimate time together, we miss out on this incredible blessing from God. I believe that sex in a Christian marriage is different. Every couple can have the physical, emotional, and mental parts of sex. But because the Holy Spirit dwells in every Christian, there is a spiritual dimension of sex that non-Christians do not have. That takes sex to a whole new level. The best sex possible is in the context of a Christian marriage.  

Today’s One Thing: Talk together about being purposeful in your sex life. Then follow through! 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Truthful words stand the test of time, but lies are soon exposed.’ Proverbs 12:19(NLT)

‘The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in those who tell the truth.’ Proverbs 12:22(NLT)

‘Honesty guides good people; dishonesty destroys treacherous people.’ Proverbs 11:3(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

Trust is interesting isn’t it? When we have trust in a relationship, we often take it for granted. Then when we break trust with someone, we realize how hard it is to rebuild it. Here is something interesting that I have observed from talking to people over the years: When trust is broken in in one area of a marriage, it can bleed over into other areas. If you lie about spending money, you will probably lose your spouse’s trust in financial matters. You may also lose their trust in every area of marriage where you also might lie. Sometimes people tell me, “I just told one lie. Why is that such a big deal?” I usually answer, “Because it is!” If you have trust in your marriage today, cherish it and guard it with your life. If trust has been broken, ask your spouse what you need to do to regain their trust—and then begin doing it.

Today’s One Thing: Seek God’s help in being trustworthy in every area of your life and marriage! 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling

‘Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people. ‘ Philippians 2:14-15(NLT)

‘Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. ‘ 1 John 4:7(NLT)

Devotional Content: 

What if your marriage was a light to everyone you know? What if you and your spouse lived your marriage each and every day in a way that made other couples want their marriages to look like yours? What if as a couple you prayed, served, gave, put God as number one, and put each other as number two every day? Then, what if the couples who admired you began to do the same thing? Other people would begin to notice those marriages and want to emulate those couples. We would have a “marriage light” spreading to other communities and places around the world, and we would finally see that light coming over the horizon back to us, because it would have traveled around the world. What would our world be like then? Can you even begin to imagine what could happen? That’s my dream. It has been since day one of Awesome Marriage. It just takes one marriage at a time to begin to ignite the fire. Can God use your marriage to illuminate the world?

Today’s One Thing: What if you and your spouse said yes to God today about becoming a “marriage light” in the world? 

from One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day by Dr. Kim Kimberling