Category: ZZ

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Devotion for Men ZZ

Leader of the Leader

‘Fear of the Lord is the foundation of wisdom. Knowledge of the Holy One results in good judgment.’ Proverbs 9:10(NLT)

The second need for the total, spiritual man is to allow God to lead him. Every child needs a father, and every wife a husband, who gets his daily directions from the Lord. When your family understands that you seek to live in the center of God’s will—and you encourage them to do so as well—your decisions will not be challenged so vigorously or so often. Allowing the Lord to lead you builds your family’s confidence in you as their spiritual leader, and observing your dependence on the Father will help them to depend on Him as well. There’s no finer inheritance you can pass on to your children than to teach them to seek God for everything and obey Him, regardless of the consequences. After all, “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight” (Prov. 9:10, ESV).

Children can begin at an early age to talk to the Lord about what they should do with their lives. They should form the habit of asking the Father to help them when they’re young. They should also learn that decisions based on human reasoning are not adequate for spiritual success—God must lead them if they desire fruitful living.

When my children were young and in want or need of something, I would say to them often, “We must wait on the Lord,” or “Let’s wait on that and pray together.” Later, I would follow up with them by asking, “Do you feel like God has said anything to you or shown you how to proceed?” At times, they would answer, “I haven’t heard Him say anything.” I wouldn’t respond with a laugh or scold them in any way. I would simply say, “That’s all right. You may not understand for a while, but God’s in the process of teaching you. If you follow me as I follow the Lord, God can transfer that lesson through me to you.”

Some of the most precious moments in our home were those when we knelt in prayer together, seeking the Father’s mind and direction. It was always exciting to see who would first receive the clear guidance we needed. 

Dad, you can give your children everything else in the world, but if you don’t give them a father who’s accepted Christ as Savior and allow Him to lead you in decisions, attitudes, and actions, you’ll never become the man, husband, and father God wants you to be.

from Man Of God by Charles F. Stanley

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Devotion for Men ZZ

The Right Start

‘So don’t be surprised when I say, ‘You must be born again.’ ‘ John 3:7(NLT)

‘It’s your sins that have cut you off from God. Because of your sins, he has turned away and will not listen anymore.’ Isaiah 59:2(NLT)

‘And now you Gentiles have also heard the truth, the Good News that God saves you. And when you believed in Christ, he identified you as his own by giving you the Holy Spirit, whom he promised long ago. The Spirit is God’s guarantee that he will give us the inheritance he promised and that he has purchased us to be his own people. He did this so we would praise and glorify him.’ Ephesians 1:13-14(NLT)

The first step to real manhood is spiritual rebirth—“You must be born again” (John 3:7). The most crucial need of every family is a father whose heart is indwelt by Christ. 

Why?

Because by nature, you’re spiritually dead, for “your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God” (Isa. 59:2). You can’t recognize who the Lord created you to be for your family—or even what your family needs from you—because you’re completely severed from His presence by your transgressions and cannot receive His guidance.

Therefore, you must believe that Jesus went to the cross to die for your sins and that His sacrifice was sufficient to reconcile you to the Father. When you tell Jesus that His death on the cross was sufficient payment for your sins and ask Him to come into your heart to forgive you, cleanse you, and indwell you, He comes into your life at that moment, and your salvation is guaranteed through the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit (Eph. 1:13-14). 

The husband is the head of his home, and when Christ comes into his heart, he is fully equipped to be his family’s spiritual leader. He has the indwelling Christ to help him become the total man he needs to be. 

Friend, if you are without Christ, you have deprived your family of the one thing they need above everything else—spiritual leadership. However, if you’re a man of God, then the Lord can make you into everything your family needs—a man who has the wisdom, grace, and power to take care of them physically, emotionally, and spiritually. There is no substitute for a saved husband and father.

from Man Of God by Charles F. Stanley

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Devotion for Men ZZ

The “Ideal” Man

‘No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.’ Micah 6:8(NLT)

It wasn’t that long ago when a female member of my congregation sat before me in my office, single, frustrated, and teary-eyed. Once she briefed me on what had prompted her visit, I realized her idea of a happy future centered on marriage—and as soon as possible.  

After listening to her reasons for feeling the way she did, I asked her: “What type of man are you looking for?” Thirty minutes later, she’d completed her description—a breed of man that doesn’t exist except in some imaginations. Since that time, I’ve asked many women the same question I asked the young woman in my office, with similar responses. Some visualize the ideal man as a strong, healthy, well-dressed, good-looking, aggressive, successful, dependable, and responsible businessman. Others picture someone adventurous, exciting, romantic, and artistic. Either way, he’s interested in all things and excels at most. He loves only one woman but charms them all. He’s an attentive listener who’s in touch with his feelings. And most excellent of all, he’s a super-spiritual leader in his life and home.

Have you ever met anyone who fits this description? If not, take heart, my friend … no one has.

This meeting prompted a deeper look into God’s Word and led me to ask myself: Who is the “ideal” man? What kind of characteristics does he exhibit? For starters, the ideal man is not a perfect man by any means. Rather, he’s a maturing man, a striving man, a studying man—but most of all he’s a man who seeks the Father with all his heart, soul, mind, and strength (Mark 12:30). He’s not arrived at his goal but is on his way to becoming the husband his wife is longing for and the father his children need. He’s a man on the most exciting journey of his life. He’s learning to be a balanced, Christ-centered man—the total man God created him to be. 

In the devotions that follow, I will describe for you seven characteristics of the total, spiritual man and how understanding these characteristics and adopting them into your life will help you become the man of God, husband, and father you were always meant to be. 

from Man Of God by Charles F. Stanley

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage ZZ

Dead End

‘Jesus looked at them intently and said, “Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But with God everything is possible.”’ Matthew 19:26(NLT)

‘“O Sovereign Lord ! You made the heavens and earth by your strong hand and powerful arm. Nothing is too hard for you! ‘ Jeremiah 32:17(NLT)

‘For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. ‘ Philippians 4:13(NLT)

‘Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord God is the eternal Rock.’ Isaiah 26:4(NLT)

‘Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.”’ Deuteronomy 31:8(NLT)

Last week I was driving home. I was coming a different way because I had been in a meeting in a different part of the city. I don’t go that route often because a train track crosses the road at one point and my experience is that the trains that cross there have a million cars (a slight exaggeration). As I approached the tracks, I saw a train was approaching and knew that by the time I reached the intersection the train would be stopping all traffic for some time. I quickly turned down a side street that I thought would lead me to a street that would allow me to go around the train. It would take me a little out of my way, but it kept me moving and would be better than waiting for the train to pass. So first a right turn for a couple of blocks and then a left to take me around the train path. I was feeling really good about outwitting the train and then I came to a sign that said ‘dead end’ but to me it did not look like a dead end. I could see pretty far in front of me. I thought it must be an old sign or was there to keep people from cutting through the neighborhood. With that logic, I went for it. I hate being wrong but I was wrong. The sign said ‘dead end’ and it was a dead end. No way out. Stuck. I turned around and retraced my path back to the train track. The train had passed and traffic was moving.  

As we have looked at a number of traffic signs during this two part reading plan, I want to close with this one. Never see your marriage as a dead end. Never give up hope. Stay committed. There is always a solution. Pray for your marriage. Fight together for your marriage. Heed the signs. STOP before you choose pornography or infidelity. YIELD to your spouse and fight the battle of selfishness. Stay on the ONE WAY street that God has given you in your marriage. Obey the DO NOT ENTER signs. Go SLOW and embrace your marriage. Do not run past the CAUTION signs. Protect your marriage and BUCKLE UP. Navigate the CURVES together. Finally, know that quitting is not an option. You have the God of the universe on your side. He has the answers that you do not. He puts the marriage relationship right under our relationship with Him. Your marriage never has to be a DEAD END.  

Today’s Challenge: 

1. What gives you hope in your marriage even when others might quit?

2. When Dr. Kim says that “You have the God of the universe on your side,” how does that change your perspective?

3.  What is something that might at first look like a dead end, but with God’s help is not?

Going Deeper:

If you ever feel your marriage is at a DEAD END, will you give it one more shot? God wants to work a miracle. He just needs you to ask Him in!

from Traffic Signs And Your Marriage – Part 2 by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage ZZ

Curve

‘“Watch out! Don’t let your hearts be dulled by carousing and drunkenness, and by the worries of this life. Don’t let that day catch you unaware, like a trap. For that day will come upon everyone living on the earth. Keep alert at all times. And pray that you might be strong enough to escape these coming horrors and stand before the Son of Man.”’ Luke 21:34-36(NLT)

‘This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”’ Joshua 1:9(NLT)

‘Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. ‘ Colossians 3:2(NLT)

‘So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. ‘ Galatians 6:9(NLT)

Curve signs warn us. We do not see them with every curve on the highway, but when we do see them, they tell us that there are some serious curves ahead. We need this information to help us prepare for what lies ahead. Curves are not disasters. They are just part of the highway system. If we are aware, we make it past them without a problem. If we were not aware of them, they could definitely cause us serious issues.  

Marriage is also full of curves. Last year I did a blog series on “Destinations.” In short, the premise was that we are all on a ‘marriage highway’ and we all want an awesome marriage. To reach that destination, we have to navigate the highway. The marriage highway has curves. The curves are the normal things every marriage encounters. You will have financial issues. You will have times that you do not feel emotional love for your spouse. You will not always agree on everything. You will have to work on communication and your sex life and resolving conflict. These are all curves and being aware that everyone encounters them helps you prepare. Your awareness lets you embrace these curves and work through them together. That is what keeps curves from becoming disasters. The good news is that navigated curves help build awesome marriages.  

Is your marriage on a curve today? WIll you let God navigate you through it? He wants to do that for you. So ask Him to join you today.

Today’s Challenge: 

1. What are the curves you have experienced in your marriage thus far?

2. What curve is your marriage navigating today?  

3. WHat helps you as a couple to navigate these curves in your marriage?

Going Deeper:

Too often I see couples ignore the curve signs until they are at the brink of disaster. Remember that God always has an answer for every curve. Develop the habit of going to Him immediately as your marriage enters a curve.

from Traffic Signs And Your Marriage – Part 2 by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage ZZ

Buckle Up

‘Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.’ 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18(NLT)

‘And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him. And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for.’ 1 John 5:14-15(NLT)

‘“I also tell you this: If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you. For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”’ Matthew 18:19-20(NLT)

‘Keep on loving each other as brothers and sisters. Don’t forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it! ‘ Hebrews 13:1-2(NLT)

‘And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.’ Hebrews 10:25(NLT)

I barely remember riding in cars that did not have seat belts. Then seat belts became standard equipment but no one really used them much. In my family growing up, we wore them when we traveled out of the city but not in the city. Then people began doing studies which showed that seat belts actually saved lives. It was an evolutionary process from no seat belts, to seat belts, to seat belts work. Today there are signs that remind us to ‘buckle up’ but most of us already have before we see the sign. Buckle up: it makes sense and it saves lives.

Do you ‘buckle up’ your marriage? Do you do the things to keep it safe? Here are two suggestions.  

First, pray together. I can hear some of you saying, I can’t do that. That would be too weird. Yet, you can do that and yes, at first, it may be weird. People ask me, “what is one thing I can do to improve my marriage?” My answer 100% of the time is pray together. Pray for each other. Pray silently together. Pray out loud together. There is no magic formula. Just start today and pray.  

Second, worship together. There is something special that happens when we worship with our spouse. In Genesis 2, we see God spend time with Adam and Eve together. There was something very special about that and it is a model for us. Worship together every week with your spouse. It will make a difference.  

Buckle up. Keep your marriage safe. Pray. Worship. Start now.

Today’s Challenge: 

1. What are you doing today to keep your marriage safe?

2. If the two of you are not praying together, why not begin today? Keep it simple and stay at the comfort level of the one who is least comfortable.

3. Do you worship together each week. If not, will you commit to begin this weekend?

Going Deeper:

Keeping your marriage safe is really about putting God exactly where He wants to be and that is right in the center of your marriage. Together commit to put Him there and keep Him there every day.  

from Traffic Signs And Your Marriage – Part 2 by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage ZZ

Slow

‘As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.” But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”’ Luke 10:38-42(NLT)

‘Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.’ Psalms 62:5-6(NLT)

‘Be still in the presence of the Lord , and wait patiently for him to act. Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.’ Psalms 37:7(NLT)

There are traffic signs that tell us to go slow.  Sometimes it is for the safety of others.  It could be  a ‘school zone’ or an area close to a park. If I slow down, I become more aware of what is going on around me. There may be children crossing the street on their way to or from school. At the park, a child may be playing ball and be so caught up in the game that they do not realize that they have chased the ball into the street. By going slow, I can adjust to the situation. I am more aware and able to respond.  

There are other times that the ‘slow’ sign is for my safety. There may be a change in road conditions and by going slower, I can make the necessary adjustments. Where I live there is a lot of road construction going on. Going slower keeps me safer in construction areas.

My life is fast paced. There are many days that I do not get everything done that I either need to do or want to do. I get up early, have a quiet time, work out, get dressed and go – and go – and go – all day long. I need to slow down. I need to slow down for others – especially my wife. I need to take time to be with her each day. If I am always on the go, I do not listen well or interact well. Slowing down makes my marriage better.

Slowing down also helps me. Over time a hectic daily schedule is not healthy. My body needs a rest and time to relax. My soul needs a rest and I need more focused time with God where I can really hear what He is telling me.   

So the bottom line is slow down. Slow down and embrace your marriage. Slow down and embrace life. What can you do today to slow down and, more important, what is keeping you from doing it?

Today’s Challenge: 

1. In your life, what would a sign marked SLOW mean to you?

2. What is one why you could slow down and embrace your marriage?

3. How can you slow down in order to hear what God is saying to you?

Going Deeper:

As you think about the benefits of slowing down, what would keep you from making those changes? How can you overcome those obstacles?

from Traffic Signs And Your Marriage – Part 2 by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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Dating ZZ

“Creating a Foundation of Healthy Sexuality”

‘So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.’ Genesis 1:27(NLT)

‘“Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’” And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”’ Matthew 19:4-6(NLT)

‘God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin. ‘ 1 Thessalonians 4:3(NLT)

No matter what your experience is with your sexuality, we’re convinced those who handle their physical oneness best in marriage are the couples who have developed a healthy view of sexuality. Since sex was God’s idea and creation, let’s move past the Hollywood stereotype of it and go to the original source. God intended sex to be beautiful, pleasurable, and to create oneness within marriage. God not only created sex, but also sees it as great within marriage.

Because sex is God’s creation, He has established boundaries not to limit enjoyment but to enhance His designed and desired oneness. God’s sexual limitations—basically warnings to refrain from (1) adultery and (2) sexual immorality—are not established to condemn sex but rather to keep marriage pure and honorable. Why go to the hassle of providing guidelines? Because He wants the best for you. God’s words on sexuality are beautiful and sacred, and when experienced His way sex can provide the physical, emotional, and spiritual connection for which we long. Sex will be a seal and a celebration of your marriage.

Without this theological framework, sex simply becomes reduced to nothing more than a recreational pleasure act that can produce children. Culture has embraced and promoted a much lower view of sex where anything goes. As a result, we are seeing marriages crushed by adultery and pornography. Sex has been turned into a cheap thrill, or even worse, a way to manipulate and enslave one another. That’s not God’s design for the sacred act of sex.

When Jesus said “becoming one flesh” (Eph. 5:31), he meant that as more than just having sex; the sexual act is clearly an experience of literally joining your bodies as one. Your sexual relationship is a uniting experience. Your sexual relationship becomes a sacred seal of the lifelong commitment you make toward oneness. You really can’t understand your sexuality and the important role it plays in your relationship if you don’t view it as a gift from God. It’s a gift that keeps on giving and connecting the two of you into one.

* Is your view of sexuality based on God’s view, or the worlds view? What expectations about sex are you bringing into this marriage and have you discussed them in pre-marital counseling?

from Getting Ready for Marriage by Jim Burns & Doug Fields

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Dating ZZ

“Managing Money”

‘Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.’ Matthew 6:21(NLT)

‘For the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. And some people, craving money, have wandered from the true faith and pierced themselves with many sorrows.’ 1 Timothy 6:10(NLT)

Few people realize before marriage that their own personal relationship with money is critical to the health of their relationship when they’re married. As odd as it sounds, everyone really does have a relationship with money. You can’t escape it; you can only make sure that it becomes a positive bond and not a source of bondage.

Being a good manager of money is often a matter of attitude. Your actions toward money will reflect your attitude. Some people have a stronger love relationship with the almighty dollar than with their chosen partner. They even love money more than God. However, when you learn to put God and your family ahead of money, you are beginning to practice healthy money management.

Speaking of God, did you know He gives us a lot of instruction about money? In the Bible, there are about 500 verses on prayer, 500 verses on faith, and more than 2,350 verses on money! Management of one’s finances is a spiritual issue. In the church world, money management is often called stewardship. For those of us who follow Jesus, we are called to be faithful stewards (essentially, managers) of our resources. Many financial counselors wake up every day excited to help others become good stewards. Ron Blue is one advisor so inspired to help couples find financial success and happiness. A couple of his key principles of stewardship are that God owns it all and delayed gratification is the key to financial maturity.

As a couple you will need to decide how you handle your finances. The big question is: Will you choose spending and debt, or delayed gratification and a responsible budget? If you haven’t already discussed this, you need to give this question serious consideration, and then plot your action steps to ensure your long-term success.

* How have you treated money as a single? How are you planning on treating it as a married couple? Have you talked at length about this very important topic? Have you created a budget for your soon-to-be shared finances?

from Getting Ready for Marriage by Jim Burns & Doug Fields

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Dating ZZ

“Showing Grace and Forgiveness”

‘But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. ‘ Romans 5:8(NLT)

‘“For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. ‘ John 3:16(NLT)

Forgiveness is the glue that will keep your marriage together. Without giving and receiving forgiveness, you will disconnect from one another and lose intimacy. Forgiveness does not mean you will forget the wrong committed against you, but it does mean you make a choice not to hold a grudge. You don’t forgive because you feel like it, but because it’s a step toward healing. Forgiveness is a conscious decision. It may not necessarily remove the consequences or repair broken trust, but it does make reconciliation possible.

Because of our faith, we believe the greatest act of grace appeared when Jesus died for our sins. The sacrifice of His life on the cross made forgiveness possible, and now we are able to experience abundant life on earth and eternal life in heaven. This is the epitome of unconditional love. For us to receive God’s forgiveness and then choose not to forgive our spouse is the highest form of arrogance. When you forgive your partner, you are choosing to deliberately “drop the charges” of the wrong done to you. You are never more like Jesus than when you forgive. A healthy, thriving marriage is made up of two imperfect people who will hurt one another, but who also know how to forgive one another.

* Though this is one of the shortest lessons, it’s probably one of the most important. What is your motivation to forgive your fiancé when you really don’t feel like it? Have you witnessed Biblical forgiveness from them? Have you given it yourself? Look over the pattern of hurt and forgiveness that characterizes your relationship, is it healthy and Biblically based?

from Getting Ready for Marriage by Jim Burns & Doug Fields