Category: Devotion for Women

‘The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”’ Exodus 14:14(NLT)

by Danielle Novotny

Recently, one of my friends said something that really struck deep with me. She said that as a stepmom, you need to realize you’re stepping into the line of fire.

Many times over the last few years, I have felt just that. I have been the target, and I have been pulled in different directions. There were times when I was asked to fill many different roles and was asked to help in various conflicts that have occurred. I have found myself frustrated with the times I have given my advice, and it fell on deaf ears. There have been so many things that have just worn me down: the court battles, the tears, the bickering, etc.—it’s exhausting.

However, I hold on to the little wins throughout the years.: when my stepdaughter tells me, she loves me or when she is comfortable enough to ask for advice or just randomly hugs me. When her mom thanks me for something or when my husband tells me he appreciates me. Even when my biological daughter stops what she’s doing to tell me she loves me or thanks me for being her mom. I hold on to those moments, and I force myself to remember that God has this. We need only to be still, and he will fight our battles. He can mend hearts. Our God CAN work miracles.

So Mamas, when you’re in those storms and just seem to be barely making it—remember how much God loves you and how much he wants your family to win. He does see you. He wants good things for you. Lean into Him and find rest. Take time this week and recognize just how good of a job you’re doing and let God fight your battles. You are loved, and you matter so much. Keep doing good.

QUESTION TO PONDER: Talk to God about the good things that have happened in your family lately. Ask Him to help you find the good in your life more often and for the grace to let Him work all things out for good in your life. Write down anything that comes to your mind as you pray.

WHAT’S NEXT: Write John 15:5 on your bathroom mirror. Ask God to help you remember that He wants you to stay close to Him and depend on Him for everything you need. He will help you, Mama! You are never alone!

from Encouragement For Bonus Moms

‘But those who wish to boast should boast in this alone: that they truly know me and understand that I am the Lord who demonstrates unfailing love and who brings justice and righteousness to the earth, and that I delight in these things. I, the Lord , have spoken!’ Jeremiah 9:24(NLT)

by Karolyn Dicken

I would bet that my husband and I daily receive approximately 17 random “I love you’s” from our youngest child. He will literally be playing by himself in his room and yell out, “I love you!” From the restroom, “I love you!”. Twenty minutes after, I’m convinced he’s fallen asleep, “I love you!” It’s one of his most endearing qualities. 

I was thinking about this characteristic the other day and how sweet and meaningful the spontaneous affirmation is. It made me think about my relationship with the Lord—how I’d love to be the kind of daughter that randomly, consistently, and frequently shouted out, “I love you!” to my Heavenly Father as I moved throughout my day. However, this isn’t who I am – yet. I tend to get bogged down by my endless to-do lists, juggling full-time work, and intentional parenting and trying to be the best that I can but often struggling with where I’ve inevitably fallen short. 

Since becoming a parent to my bonus son over eight years ago (and adding a couple more biological ones along the way), my interactions with the Lord hadn’t had the depth, consistency, or fervor that I had when I was single with fewer responsibilities. I’ve often allowed this to be what deterred me from spending time with Him. I realize how much I’ve allowed these excuses to hinder my growth in becoming more like Jesus, and I’m committed to changing those old habits. Even if it’s *only* ten minutes, I’m going to be in the Word. Also, if it’s *only* worship music while I’m busy driving, I’m going to soak it up. Even if it’s *only* a random, “I love you,” I’m going to pour it out to Him. Because even more than I love when my children come to me with their hearts and spontaneous affection, He loves and delights when we go to Him with ours. 

QUESTION TO PONDER What excuses have you allowed to get in your way in your relationship with Jesus? What characteristics do you see in your children that remind you of our God? 

WHAT’S NEXT  Write down some affirmations or scriptures that you find encouraging and post them in visible places around your home this week. 

from Encouragement For Bonus Moms

‘The Lord is good, a strong refuge when trouble comes. He is close to those who trust in him.’ Nahum 1:7(NLT)

by Danielle Novotny

I am sitting down after the end of a long, hard day trying to find words to encourage other stepmoms, foster moms, biological moms, etc. Today was rough.

We all have days when we struggle to function or get through the days by counting the temper tantrums in a screaming toddler or the difficult attitude in a child, etc.. You know the days I’m talking about, right? Just days that run you down spiritually, mentally, and sometimes physically.

So what happens when our kids have difficult days? Are we available to them to listen or to just hold them tight and remind them how much they are loved? What about when our husbands are run down? Are we supporting our husbands in listening to them and allowing them to have a safe place to come to without judgment? Maybe everyone takes out their emotions on you when they are having a tough day, and you’re left feeling confused and hurt. Mom life isn’t so glamorous all the time. However, I remind myself as I feel broken down and frazzled today that I was the one that my daughter came to because she was having a really hard time with something. I was also the one my husband vented to when he was dealing with a trial of his own. When I began to realize the patterns of the day, I realized I must be doing an okay job if I am comforting others on their bad days too.

Then I thought about God. How many times does He pick us up and hold us and calm us in our crazy, emotional storms? For me, ALL THE TIME. Sometimes I’m too stubborn to let Him help, and then I realize He is going to help anyway, and frankly, I need the help. No matter how many times I try to do it all on my own, God is there.

QUESTIONS TO PONDER What do you need to hand over to God today? Are you struggling with letting him help you? Are you struggling with being there emotionally for your kids or your husband? What areas do you need to give to God? What do you need to thank God for today?

WHAT’S NEXT Find 3 things to jot down in a notebook to thank God for. What have you seen Him do in your family lately?

from Encouragement For Bonus Moms

‘I will teach all your children, and they will enjoy great peace.’ Isaiah 54:13(NLT)

by Karolyn Dicken

I don’t know what it is about three day weekends, but they make me feel like I have all the time in the world to get things done. That is, until about 6 pm on Monday when I panic regarding all the necessary tasks I let go by the wayside in pursuit of my lofty goals. 

Last weekend was no different for me. Monday afternoon, I found myself updating my kids’ baby books, something I haven’t looked at in years. I finally took the time to put together the pictures I’d compiled for our oldest—my bonus son. For years, I’ve had pictures organized by his age before I was a part of his life. As I put them in the album, I started reminiscing. I looked at his sneaky smile as he cruised along in his walker. I noticed his soft curls as he sat on his Memaw’s counter, eager to help. I saw the look of joy as he rode with his uncle on a tractor for the first time. 

I was captivated by his innocence, youth, and joy. We’ve been so challenged by him lately. Granted, he is 13. But, we’ve also just recently started more of a 50/50 schedule with his biological mom, which is going pretty well—it’s just so different than the eight years we had him full-time. It’s an adjustment for all of us. Because of this schedule, I find myself getting stuck in the in-between. I’m wrestling with what is and isn’t worth a battle. I worry about if what we’re doing is enough or too much. I’m wondering if we’ve dropped the ball. You know, all the lies that can easily sneak into our minds as moms, particularly moms that don’t have a daily, consistent influence on their children. 

However, looking at those pictures renewed my energy to engage despite the frustration, push-back, and disappointment. Sometimes, it’s so easy to forget that the children you’re struggling with are the ones you were so excited about when they first came home or when you first found out you were expecting. We forget that they were full of the giggles and excitement and curiosity that little kids are made of. It was so sweet to be reminded of that anticipation and joy I had over becoming one of his parents almost ten years ago. I love the truth that “every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows” (James 1:17). But how often do I forget that?

QUESTION TO PONDER How did you feel when you found out you were pregnant or first expecting a foster placement, adoption, or stepchild? How has that perception changed throughout the years? How can we be praying for you and your children?

WHAT’S NEXT Go back through some pictures, a photo album, or memories on social media to remind yourself about the positive!

from Encouragement For Bonus Moms

‘Then I heard the Lord asking, “Whom should I send as a messenger to this people? Who will go for us?” I said, “Here I am. Send me.”’ Isaiah 6:8(NLT)

by Danielle Novotny

We are called into this position of motherhood for a reason. God entrusted us with these kids. Often I look at my daughters and think about how God chose me to be their mom/stepmom. Woah. It can feel overwhelming at times as I think about my role in these girls’ lives.

I am reminded of Isaiah 6:8 when I am doubting myself and letting fear take over, “Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, ‘Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?’ And I said, ‘Here am I. Send me!'” I am reminded of Isaiah’s courage when faced with a daunting task. How much could we learn from Isaiah by applying this courage to our roles as mothers and wives?

Being a mom can be utterly terrifying. So many questions fill my head as I lay in bed at night. Sometimes I have days when I think I am so underqualified for this position! Then I remind myself that I need to find the courage to face these roles head-on and say: “Here I am!” God knew I was the right person for my daughter and stepdaughter. Now I have to have the faith that I can help them grow to be Godly and powerful women. Women that can face their hurdles with the courage of Isaiah, facing trials with unwavering faith and perseverance. “She is clothed in strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear or the future” (Proverbs 31:25).

QUESTION TO PONDER What verses have you found that have encouraged you in your journey through motherhood? 

WHAT’S NEXT Find ways to show your children how you love them and care for them. Lift them up this week and write them a little note about what you love about them and leave it somewhere for them to find.

from Encouragement For Bonus Moms