Category: Devotion for Men

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Yield

‘The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.”’ Mark 12:31(NLT)

‘Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.’ Philippians 2:3-4(NLT)

‘You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges ; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross.’ Philippians 2:5-8(NLT)

‘We who are strong must be considerate of those who are sensitive about things like this. We must not just please ourselves. We should help others do what is right and build them up in the Lord. For even Christ didn’t live to please himself. As the Scriptures say, “The insults of those who insult you, O God, have fallen on me.” ‘ Romans 15:1-3(NLT)

Devotional Content:

I was driving through my neighborhood this morning. It was a beautiful day. I saw a friend jogging toward me. I looked over to wave at him about the same time I passed a YIELD sign. This particular YIELD sign was at a place where two roads merge into one.  If two cars try to merge from two lanes into one at the same time, the results are not good. Thus, there is a YIELD sign and it was in my lane. I was supposed to slow down or stop to let the other driver enter the lane before I did. Luckily, I looked up in time to hit my brakes before I hit another car. Close call because I did not obey the YIELD sign.  

There are YIELD signs all over my marriage and often I ignore them too. I often interpret the YIELD to mean that I do not get my way and Nancy does. What it really means is for me to be unselfish even when I do not feel like it. There are times I get it and there are times I do not want to get it. I have said for years that the number one problem in marriage is selfishness. I should know – I can achieve professional status in this area. 

I have made an interesting observation. When I am driving and obey the YIELD sign, I never have a problem. I never had a wreck from obeying the YIELD sign. In my marriage, when I am unselfish, my marriage is really good. Do you know that Nancy and I have never, ever had a fight when I was being unselfish? Amazing, huh?

What if you envisioned a YIELD sign right next to your spouse? Then, what if you obeyed it? Finally, what if you did that day after day after day? Awesome Marriage? Probably.

Today’s Challenge: 

1. When you are driving how do you handle YIELD signs?

2. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, how selfish are you in your marriage?

3. How has selfishness affected your marriage?

Going Deeper:

Together make a YIELD sign to put on your refrigerator. Let it be a reminder for both of you to choose to YIELD instead of being selfish.

from Traffic Signs And Your Marriage – Part 1

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Stop

‘Stay away from every kind of evil.’ 1 Thessalonians 5:22(NLT)

‘But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. ‘ Matthew 5:28(NLT)

‘Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. ‘ 1 Corinthians 6:18(NLT)

‘Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.’ Hebrews 13:4(NLT)

‘People with integrity walk safely, but those who follow crooked paths will be exposed.’ Proverbs 10:9(NLT)

Devotional Content:

The STOP sign is pretty cut and dry. Stop means stop. Failing to stop could result in a ticket or even being smashed by another car. The STOP sign is a non-negotiable. If you take the driving test to get your license and you do not stop at the STOP sign, you fail the driver’s test. Stopping when told to do so is essential. There is no argument. There are no second chances.

There are STOP signs in marriage too. They mean the same thing in marriage as they do on the streets. Here are two big ones: pornography, and infidelity. The bottom line is that you stop: You do not go there. No trial runs. No baby steps. No “just this once.” STOP.

Make it an absolute. Do not cross the line. Do not give in. Pornography and infidelity destroy families and marriages. You are not the exception. Actually, there are no exceptions. These are relationship killers. The sign says “STOP,” and that is exactly what you must do. If you run this sign, the consequences are far more devastating than you could ever imagine. STOP means STOP for a reason. So STOP. Today. Now.

Today’s Challenge: 

1. Culture tells us that pornography is not a “stop sign.” Do you agree or disagree?

2. When Jesus talks about adultery, He takes the sin up a notch and includes lust. Why do you think Jesus put adultery and lust as equals?

3. What are “baby steps” that can lead us to adultery and pornography?

Going Deeper:

Come up with a plan together to protect your marriage from adultery and pornography.

from Traffic Signs And Your Marriage – Part 1

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Traffic Signs And Your Marriage

Introduction

‘Get all the advice and instruction you can, so you will be wise the rest of your life.’ Proverbs 19:20(NLT)

‘But be sure that everything is done properly and in order.’ 1 Corinthians 14:40(NLT)

Devotional Content:

We pass them every day. Sometimes we read them and sometimes we do not.  Sometimes we obey them and sometimes we do not. Traffic signs are everywhere.  They are there to protect, to guide, to warn, and to bring order. We want every other driver on the roads and highways to abide by them. Yet, on the other hand, we want a little flexibility with these signs when it comes to ourselves. If I am in a hurry, I really do not have time to come to a full stop at the STOP sign. If there are no other cars in my line of vision, why do I need to slow down at the YIELD sign? What about the CAUTION sign? After all, I have been driving for a number of years. I don’t need some sign to tell me to be cautious! Traffic signs are everywhere. I just do not want them to get in my way.

What if these signs were in your marriage? Would you read them, obey them, or ignore them? If the signs were there, would you want your spouse to follow them to the letter?  What about you? Follow or ignore?

Over the next few days, we are going to look at traffic signs and ask, “What do these traffic signs mean if we apply them to marriage?” Join me. It’s going to be one heck of a ride!  

Today’s Challenge: 

1. What traffic signs are you most likely to ignore — or sometimes not obey?

2. What happens if another driver chooses to ignore a traffic sign?  

3. What if that other driver’s careless driving impacts you?

Going Deeper:

What would “traffic signs” in your marriage look like?

from Traffic Signs And Your Marriage – Part 1

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Devotion for Men ZZ

Are You Your Wife’s Warrior?

‘For when a strong man is fully armed and guards his palace, his possessions are safe—’ Luke 11:21(NLT)

‘So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.”’ Deuteronomy 31:6(NLT)

‘He trains my hands for battle; he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow.’ Psalms 18:34(NLT)

‘A final word: Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ‘ Ephesians 6:10(NLT)

Devotional Content:

Today is the final day of this series for men. So far we have answered two questions. The first: “Is your wife your best friend?” The second: “Is God at the center of your marriage?” Today’s question is “Are you her warrior?”

If you search online for the word warrior, you get various descriptions of someone—usually a fighter or a soldier—who is courageous, brave, and vigorous. As husbands, God has given us the role of being the leader. I think being a warrior is part of that.

As warriors, we bring a sense of safety and security to our wives. They want to know that we will protect them, look after them, and keep them from harm. They want to know that we would never knowingly harm them.

A husband warrior also has the courage to lead his wife and to do it in a way that honors God.

Here are some ways for you to be a warrior:

1. Set a level playing field. If you have ever hurt your wife in any way, tell her you are sorry and that from today on you will never knowingly hurt her.

2. Ask her what you can do to help her feel protected and cared for.

3. Ask her about her fears and then together lay those at the feet of God in prayer.

4. Pray for God to daily show you how to be a warrior in your marriage.

Try this for 60 days and let us know how you like being a “warrior” in your marriage.

Today’s Challenge:

Dr. Kim shares that God has given husbands the role of being the leader and that part of that is being a warrior. Wives want to know that husbands will protect them, look after them, and protect them from harm. In what ways can you better be a warrior for your wife?

Going Deeper:

1. Take time to ask your wife about her fears this week. Then pray with your wife about her fears and lay those fears at the feet of God.

2. Take Dr. Kim’s advice and level the playing field. Tell your wife you are sorry if you ever hurt her, and let her know you will never willingly hurt her.

3. Do something special this week to tell your wife you will keep her safe. You could write her a note, find a Bible verse to share with her, or buy a small, creative gift for her that represents you as her warrior.

4. Pray and ask God to help you have courage and to be a warrior for your wife.

from Three Questions For Husbands by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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Devotion for Men ZZ

Is God at the Center of Your Marriage?

‘But there is one thing I want you to know: The head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. ‘ 1 Corinthians 11:3(NLT)

‘Care for the flock that God has entrusted to you. Watch over it willingly, not grudgingly—not for what you will get out of it, but because you are eager to serve God. Don’t lord it over the people assigned to your care, but lead them by your own good example. ‘ 1 Peter 5:2-3(NLT)

‘And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body. As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.’ Ephesians 5:21-33(NLT)

Devotional Content:

Okay guys, here is the second question to ask yourself as you work to relate better to your wife.

Question: “Is God at the center of your marriage?”

For most of us, that is a tough one. This is an area that can really scare us. I mean, if we struggle being relational, how can we lead our wives spiritually? Let me give you some ideas to get you started.

Find a good church and go—take your wife and go every week.

Pray for your wife every day. Keep it simple. Ask God to give her a good day and to help you to be a great husband.

Read the Bible with her. You do not have to be a Bible scholar. Download the YouVersion Bible App. It has lots of great reading plans and devotionals that will make you look like a Bible scholar. Talk together about what you read.

That’s it. Do this for 60 days and let us know what happens.

Today’s Challenge:

Dr. Kim shares that if we aren’t relational at all, we can’t lead our wives spiritually. What can you do to be more relational with your wife when it comes to God?

Going Deeper:

1. What do you think it means to lead your wife spiritually?

2. Are you a part of a local church? If not, what is standing in your way? Make a commitment to find a church to attend regularly with your wife. Look up 3 potential churches for you to go to in your area and visit them to find the church that’s right for you.

3. Dr. Kim shares some practical ways to put God at the center of your marriage: Find a good church, pray for your wife every day, read the Bible with your wife, and then talk together about what you read. Make a commitment to do those 4 things with your wife for 60 days and watch it change your marriage.

4. Pray and ask God to help you put Him at the center of your marriage.

from Three Questions For Husbands by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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Devotion for Men ZZ

Is Your Wife Your Best Friend?

‘There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.’ Proverbs 18:24(NLT)

‘Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. ‘ Romans 12:10(NLT)

‘Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.’ 1 John 4:7-8(NLT)

Devotional Content:

Often I talk to men who really want their marriages to be better but just do not know what to do. Men are usually not very relational, but our wives usually are. We need to know how to relate to our wives on this level. Let me ask you three questions over the next few days that, I believe, will get you on the right track.

First Question: “Is your wife your best friend?” Our wives long for our companionship. They not only want us to spend time with them but also want us to enjoy the time we spend with them. Your wife wants to be your first choice. Here are some ideas:

Sit down with your wife and ask her for some ways she would like for you to spend time with her. 

When she is talking to you, listen. I mean, really listen. Be able to tell her what she said.

Respond to her questions. Add your input.

Next to God, think of her first. Pray for her. Let her know how much she means to you.

Surprise her when she least suspects you to be thinking of her.

Tell her every day that you love her.

That’s it. Try making her your best friend for the next 90 days. I promise you that your marriage will be on the way to becoming Awesome!

Today’s Challenge:

Dr. Kim shares that our wives want to be our first choice. What can you do this week to show your wife that she is your first choice?

Going Deeper:

1. Dr. Kim shares that our wives are very relational and that we need to find ways to relate to them. What is one thing you can do to better relate to your wife?

2. Sit down with your wife this week and ask her some ways she would like you to spend time with her.

3. When was the last time you surprised your wife? What is something simple you can do this week to surprise your wife?

4. Pray and ask God to help you to be best friends with your wife, and make a commitment to pray for your wife every day this week.

from Three Questions For Husbands by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Learn to Communicate Openly

‘For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her ‘ Ephesians 5:25(NLT)

By God’s grace, we can grow in our ability to be vulnerable and transparent with those we love. Author John Powell describes this process in his excellent book, Why Am I Afraid to Tell You Who I Am? He lists five levels of communication.

Most people start at level five—clichés. We might call this “elevator talk”(“Have a nice day.”) in which you speak, but share nothing.

Level four involves sharing facts. You are willing to report what you know, but still you share nothing of yourself.

At level three, people reveal opinions, their ideas, judgments and viewpoints. At this level, you start to come out of your shell and reveal a little of who you are. At the same time, you’re ready to retreat in the face of disagreement or rejection.

At level two you begin to share emotions. You let the other person know just what you feel. Again, this is risky and you must be careful not to hurt one another, but it is an essential step if you’re going to move toward a deeper relationship.

Level one is transparency—being completely open with each other, sharing the real you, from the heart. This level of communication requires a large amount of trust and commitment.

We spend most of our lives communicating with others at the safest levels of communication. In marriage, however, we ought to be getting beneath the surface. When was the last time you and your spouse had a truly transparent conversation? What do you need to do to go deeper in your communication with each other?

Take some time on your next date night to review these five levels and rate yourselves and one another on how well you are doing in each of the five. Then begin to talk. Talk about how you can deepen your love for each other by becoming more intimate and transparent with each other.

from Talk It Out!

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Shun Verbal Dust-Offs

‘The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.’ Proverbs 18:21(NLT)

Ryne Duren, former pitcher for the New York Yankees, liked to intimidate batters. He became known as the patron saint of the psych-out. He knew how to mentally harass opposing batters, dusting them off with an assortment of wildly launched pitches.

Unfortunately, a similar thing can happen in our homes, although instead of a baseball, we launch hurtful, intimidating words that inflict fear, pain, and guilt. Too late we learn what the wise man meant when he said, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Prov. 18:21).

Even though you may be very skillful with the quick retort, what do you gain when you fire off such verbal volleys? The same scripture that speaks of the tongue’s destructive power also warns that those who exercise that power will have to eat whatever diseased fruit they plant. Often, that fruit is resentment, discord, and revenge. The dust-off experts not only hurt others; they poison their own relationships.

What can you do to decrease the inclination to attack each other with hurtful words? Since Jesus Christ is “the Word” (John 1:1), pray that your speech in every aspect of home life will reflect His role as Prince of Peace and Mediator.

from Talk It Out!

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Learn to Listen

‘“Listen closely to what I am about to say. Hear me out.’ Job 13:17(NLT)

Every cell phone user has experienced it at some point, and one company has built an entire advertising campaign around it: While you are speaking to a spouse, a business contact, or a friend, the connection breaks—only you don’t know it immediately. You continue to talk until you sense something is wrong and finally ask, “Are you still there?”

Dead silence or a static screech provide the answer—yes indeed, the person on the other end is gone. And then you wonder, Just how much of what I said wasn’t heard?

How often does this type of thing happen in your marriage? One of you is talking, but no one is there on the other end of the conversation. Listening is not as easy as talking for most of us! When Job told his friends, “Listen carefully to my speech, and to my declaration with your ears,” he said it out of deep frustration (13:17). Remember that attentive listening encourages and blesses the speaker.

So the Bible urges us, “Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak” (James 1:19). If you want the tension level in your marriage to decrease, then learn to become a better listener.

from Talk It Out!

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Talking… Face to Face

‘But Moses pleaded with the Lord , “O Lord, I’m not very good with words. I never have been, and I’m not now, even though you have spoken to me. I get tongue-tied, and my words get tangled.” Then the Lord asked Moses, “Who makes a person’s mouth? Who decides whether people speak or do not speak, hear or do not hear, see or do not see? Is it not I, the Lord ? Now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say.”’ Exodus 4:10-12(NLT)

If you want to touch your wife deeply, look into her soul through her eyes. She’s longing for intimate conversation! Touching base by phone is fine, but for a woman, that’s like watching an old black-and-white TV.

One of her top romantic needs is to be heard and understood by her man. She longs for openness, a sharing of dreams, hopes, desires, and even disappointments, through focused conversation.

You might be thinking, Time out, Dennis! A conversationalist? I’m a man of few words.

Funny, that’s what Moses said when God asked him to be His spokesman: “Moses said to the LORD,‘O Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue” (Ex. 4:10). And what did the Lord tell him? “Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? . . . Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say” (vv. 11, 12).

You may say, “Now that’s fine for Moses leading the nation of Israel, but will God give me words to better communicate with your wife?” My answer: Absolutely. He cares about your wife and your marriage. The Holy Spirit still guides men (and women) in what they need to say.

Are you wondering how this is going to work? It’s easier than you may think. Start by praying and asking God to help you. Then practice answering your wife’s questions with more than one sentence. It’s okay if there’s silence for a while, but work on really sharing with her on an intimate level what you are thinking and feeling. And if you don’t know, keep on praying and asking God to help you. He will. And He may use your wife to do it!

from Talk It Out!