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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

What Does “Taking Responsibility” Really Mean?

‘For we are each responsible for our own conduct. Those who are taught the word of God should provide for their teachers, sharing all good things with them. Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant. Those who live only to satisfy their own sinful nature will harvest decay and death from that sinful nature. But those who live to please the Spirit will harvest everlasting life from the Spirit. So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.’ Galatians 6:5-10(NLT)

‘You may think you can condemn such people, but you are just as bad, and you have no excuse! When you say they are wicked and should be punished, you are condemning yourself, for you who judge others do these very same things. And we know that God, in his justice, will punish anyone who does such things. Since you judge others for doing these things, why do you think you can avoid God’s judgment when you do the same things? ‘ Romans 2:1-3(NLT)

‘“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.’ Matthew 7:3-5(NLT)

‘People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy. Blessed are those who fear to do wrong, but the stubborn are headed for serious trouble.’ Proverbs 28:13-14(NLT)

‘Honesty guides good people; dishonesty destroys treacherous people.’ Proverbs 11:3(NLT)

Devotional Content:

In many ways culture has tried to put millennials in a box. A list of adjectives is attached to millennials as a whole by some, and people just assume it fits everyone that falls into that group. My online search turned up these words to describe millennials: entitled, egotistical, the selfie or the me generation. Sources say these are the kids who got trophies for walking onto a playing field and are now, as adults, suing the higher learning institutions they graduated from because they cannot get a job. So when we look in that “millennial box,” we see a pretty negative picture.

As a counselor, I have never been fond of labels. I don’t think anyone should be put in a box. But where you find a label, you usually find a grain of truth. So for each of us, it is a call to action to see if we are wearing any of those labels. I really think that most millennials are just trying to figure life out; and Christian millennials are trying to see who God created them to be. The labels don’t work well for us as individuals, and they certainly have no place in a marriage. We get a great example in the first part of the Bible as Adam and Eve eat the fruit God told them not to eat. When God shows up, Adam decides it’s all about him. Instead of taking responsibility, he points his finger at Eve and says, “It’s her fault.” It looks like the “me generation” began with Adam!

So what does taking responsibility as a married millennial mean for you and your spouse? A great place to begin is to stop blaming each other. You are a team, and that means when one of you messes up, you right the ship together instead of pointing your fingers at each other. Then take some of those undesirable adjectives and discuss them together. Be honest with each other. Do they fit? If so, taking responsibility for your thoughts and your actions will be a great step in removing those adjectives.

I see many Christian millennials seeking to affect social change through their jobs and volunteer work. I see great young leaders looking to God for guidance as they seek to make a difference. I see a different “box” for the millennial couples that I know. I see them taking responsibility and seeking God’s plan for their life and marriage, and that is really the bottom line. God has a plan for both of you individually and as a couple, just like he has had for every person and every couple in every other generation. If you are weighed down by the labels in your “box,” being responsible may be as simple as changing “boxes.”

Today’s Challenge:

If you are totally honest with each other, what “negative labels” would fit you today? Together write them down and begin to pray for God to change your heart to His heart.

Going Deeper:

Pick one area of your marriage where you need to take more responsibility. What is your first step as you begin to work on this area?

from Challenges Of A Millennial Marriage

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

How Do We Stay Married in a Culture of Divorce?

‘I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”’ John 16:33(NLT)

‘Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?” “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’” And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” “Then why did Moses say in the law that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away?” they asked. Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended. And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.”’ Matthew 19:3-9(NLT)

‘“I also tell you this: If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you. For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”’ Matthew 18:19-20(NLT)

‘I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them. Pray this way for kings and all who are in authority so that we can live peaceful and quiet lives marked by godliness and dignity. ‘ 1 Timothy 2:1-2(NLT)

‘For you have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love. ‘ Galatians 5:13(NLT)

Devotional Content:

The challenges for married millennials are many. Not only do you live in a culture that does not put a high value on marriage, but only 26 percent of people between the ages of 18 and 29 are married. In comparison, 48 percent of baby boomers at that stage of life were married.* In addition, many of you came from broken homes, so you never saw healthy, thriving marriages. But don’t let all those statistics get you down. Remember what Jesus told us in John 16:33: “I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace. You will have suffering in this world. Be courageous! I have conquered the world” (CSB). Jesus never promised us an easy life. What He did promise is that He would always be there for us. He will always have the answers we seek. Our role is to shut out the shouts of the world so we can listen to Him. How do we stay married? Here are three points that will help you go the distance:

  1. Commitment. At one point you stood together at an altar before God and promised to stay married forever. It was a deal between the two of you and God. He will always do His part. You just have to do yours. One of the things that saddens me the most when I hear of a young couple divorcing is that they will never know the joy that comes through persevering through hardship together. Nancy and I were married at 20. There were so many times in those early years that we could have walked away from our marriage, but we didn’t. Staying committed and persevering with God at our side is what built the marriage we have today.
  2. Pray together every day for each other and for your marriage. I don’t care if you pray silently or out loud or if you are kneeling, standing, or lying down. Just pray. I promise you that God will show up.
  3. Each day see each other as a gift from God. Cherish your gift. Never take each other for granted. Serve each other as Jesus has served you.

Final thoughts: Never give up. Get help if you need it. Fight together for your marriage!

* “Millennials in Adulthood: Detached from Institutions, Networked with Friends,” Pew Research Center, March 7, 2014, [http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2014/03/07/millennials-in-adulthood/]

Today’s Challenge:

Recommit to each other and to your marriage. Promise to fight together no matter what life brings your way.

Going Deeper:

Begin to pray each day for each other and for your marriage. Keep it simple. Then ask God to help you see your spouse through His eyes every day. Thank Him for the gift He has given you.

from Challenges Of A Millennial Marriage

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

God’s Continuing Plan

‘Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.’ Hebrews 10:24-25(NLT)

‘The trustworthy person will get a rich reward, but a person who wants quick riches will get into trouble.’ Proverbs 28:20(NLT)

Devotional Content:

David and Tracy share how God led them to be foster parents. God first placed it on David’s heart and then on Tracy’s. Then together they faithfully followed God’s leading and were obedient to His call on them to foster.

Throughout the whole process, God showed them how His hands were in it. He guided them step by step along the way and gave them wisdom throughout the process.

David and Tracy were later blessed with twin infant boys to foster. They never doubted. This was exactly what God wanted them to do. Amazingly, they are now, a few years later, going to be able to adopt the boys.

God’s hand is active in all of our lives. He is the sovereign God. He wants you to follow Him and to be faithful in what He has asked you to do.

Today’s Challenge:

What can you do to encourage your spouse to be faithful to God and to what God has called them to do?

Going Deeper:

1. How often do you take initiative when it comes to sex?

2. Wives, what do you need to do to make sure that your husband isn’t the only one initiating sex?

3. When was the last time you were intimate with your spouse and the environment was romantic?

4. Will you make a commitment to setting aside time to talk about your sexual intimacy with your spouse this week?

from Seeking God’s Direction by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Dealing with a Crisis

‘How wonderful and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony!’ Psalms 133:1(NLT)

‘May God, who gives this patience and encouragement, help you live in complete harmony with each other, as is fitting for followers of Christ Jesus. Then all of you can join together with one voice, giving praise and glory to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, accept each other just as Christ has accepted you so that God will be given glory. ‘ Romans 15:5-7(NLT)

Devotional Content:

David and Tracy share openly and honestly about their unplanned pregnancy that happened outside of marriage. They decided that even though they had sinned, they were going to honor God moving forward and not run and hide from what they had done.

Dealing with this crisis was particularly difficult for David and Tracy because Tracy lost her job at her church due to the pregnancy. Tracy really struggled as she was cut off from much of her support community. She felt alone and afraid.

With every trial they faced, God’s sovereignty was apparent. God placed people in their lives to help them through this hard time. In the end, God blessed them immensely through the life of their sweet child Isabella.

Today’s Challenge:

Tracy and David chose to honor God even in the face of crisis. How can you honor God in your current situation?

Going Deeper:

1. Tracy shares about dealing with the crisis of an unplanned pregnancy and how God got her through that. Think about your life: What crisis have you walked through? How has God brought you through it?

2. David talks about the importance of community when crisis comes. Do you have strong community? If not, what can you do to build it?

3. Isabella is a great example of how God can bring great and glorious things out of any situation. How have you seen this ring true in your own life?

4. Pray and thank God that He is a forgiving God and a God of redemption.

from Seeking God’s Direction by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

Handling Baggage

‘O Lord my God, I cried to you for help, and you restored my health.’ Psalms 30:2(NLT)

‘Are any of you suffering hardships? You should pray. Are any of you happy? You should sing praises. Are any of you sick? You should call for the elders of the church to come and pray over you, anointing you with oil in the name of the Lord. Such a prayer offered in faith will heal the sick, and the Lord will make you well. And if you have committed any sins, you will be forgiven. Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. ‘ James 5:13-16(NLT)

‘“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. ‘ John 15:5(NLT)

Devotional Content:

David and Tracy share about their dating relationship prior to marriage. David came into the relationship with baggage from his previous marriage, and Tracy came into the relationship with trust issues from a previous relationship.

They began working through their baggage successfully by being open and honest with each other. We all come into marriage with baggage. The important thing is that we recognize our baggage and confront it. It’s not good to avoid these important conversations, even if it seems scary to talk about.

God wants oneness and unity in your marriage, and that can only happen if you are both fully dedicated to honesty and supporting one another through your baggage. Talk about your baggage and invite God to heal you and bring you closer together through it.

Today’s Challenge:

Tracy and David share about their baggage and how it affected them. Take some time to think: What baggage do you have?

Going Deeper:

1. Have you dealt with your baggage? If so, how?

2. What can you do to support your spouse when it comes to their baggage or things they struggle with?

3. How do you want to be supported by your spouse when it comes to your baggage and the things you struggle with?

4. Pray and ask God for healing. We all have baggage and we all need healing.

from Seeking God’s Direction by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

A Different Direction

‘Then the way you live will always honor and please the Lord, and your lives will produce every kind of good fruit. All the while, you will grow as you learn to know God better and better. We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, ‘ Colossians 1:10-11(NLT)

‘“So obey the commands of the Lord your God by walking in his ways and fearing him. ‘ Deuteronomy 8:6(NLT)

‘For all who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God.’ Romans 8:14(NLT)

Devotional Content:

Tracy shares her story. Tracy was in a tragic car wreck and yet was not physically harmed. She was overwhelmed that God had protected her when she easily could have been killed.

After the accident, she felt God leading her into full-time ministry. She faithfully listened to God’s leading and took a full-time job at her church. Through working in the ministry and faithfully pursuing Jesus, she found contentment in her singleness. She recognized that she had all she needed in Christ. It was when she was wholeheartedly following Jesus that she found David and fell in love.

God wants you to seek Him above all else and be fully satisfied in Him.

Today’s Challenge:

Tracy shared how a tragic event changed her life and moved her closer to God. Have you ever experienced anything that moved you closer to God? What was that like?

Going Deeper:

1. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being very close, how close are you to God?

2. What things do you do to deepen your relationship with God?

3. How did you know that your spouse was the one God had for you?

from Seeking God’s Direction by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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1st Marriage 2nd Marriage Devotion for Men Devotion for Women ZZ

God’s Intervention

‘But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin.’ 1 John 1:7(NLT)

‘No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.’ Micah 6:8(NLT)

‘Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? ‘ 2 Corinthians 6:14(NLT)

Devotional Content:

David shares his story. After his first marriage ended in divorce, God intervened and showed David the main reason why it was unhealthy – God wasn’t in it!

For David, that changed everything and he invited God into his life. David knew that when and if he married again, God had to be at the center.

As God was working in David’s life, he met a Godly woman and eventually remarried. Now David and Tracy have an awesome marriage and they do that by putting God first every day.

Marriage is hard and knowing God and having Him at the center is crucial to having an awesome marriage. God designed marriage and He designed us. With God, you can experience true joy. With God, His hope and eternal promises can get you through the darkest of times. With God, you can gain the wisdom and skill necessary to have a healthy marriage. God wants to help you become the spouse He intended you to be. God wants you to have a healthy and thriving marriage.

Today’s Challenge:

David shares about how God intervened in his life. How has God intervened in your life for the better?

Going Deeper:

1. In what ways have you seen God work in your relationship?

2. Can you think of a time where God brought you into a good situation because you faithfully followed him?

3. Pray and ask God to help you see His hand working in your life and in your marriage.

from Seeking God’s Direction by Dr. Kim Kimberling

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Devotion for Women ZZ

4 Secrets To Praying For Your Husband – Day 3

‘Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.’ 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18(NLT)

Secret #3: Appeal to God to transform your husband into the image of Christ. 

This is the most powerful type of praying. Instead of nagging, ask God to do the very thing He wants — to transform your husband more and more to be like Jesus in his character and conduct. Choose one character quality (such as patience, love or kindness) that you know your husband wishes he had more of … and make that your primary prayer focus.

Secret #4: Appeal to God to draw your husband into a closer relationship with Christ.

Ultimately when this happens, God’s Spirit will empower your husband in every area of his life. Ask God to forgive your husband for past and present sins and to overwhelm him with His mercy and compassion — making Himself known directly to your husband.

You, my friend, are a jewel who holds the power to influence your husband in ways beyond what you may have ever even realized. Yes, you have God’s ear. And His heart. Discover how much He cares as you learn to take everything to Him in prayer.

Heavenly Father, help my husband to make right choices throughout his work life, home life and social life — so that the enemy does not have a stronghold from which to attack our family. Let righteousness guard my husband from immoral advances of other women, pornography or immoral thoughts/desires he may experience for other women. Surround him with Your breastplate of righteousness to protect his honor and heart. And when conflict does arise, let peace both dominate and preserve the sanctity of our relationship and intimacy of our communication and love of the truth. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

from 4 Secrets To Praying For Your Husband

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Devotion for Women ZZ

4 Secrets To Praying For Your Husband – Day 2

‘Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her: “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!”’ Proverbs 31:28-29(NLT)

Secret #1: Appeal to God in prayer to help your husband succeed in his work.

God has wired men to achieve and labor to become successful in their work. (Of course women desire to achieve and become successful as well, but wives have a unique role in helping their husbands!) Learn his biggest breakthrough, what he seeks in employees he hires and what he’s looking to achieve in his next career move. Anyone can pray a general prayer, but you have the heart to really uncover what would make him dance and shout for joy.

Secret #2: Appeal to God to help your husband overcome his problems.

If your husband isn’t facing at least one problem that might discourage him, then wait until tomorrow! Whether it’s a difficult boss, a lack of money, the temptation to sin or a struggle with discouragement, just imagine how your husband will feel when he discovers you care so much that you’ll help shoulder the weight with him.

from 4 Secrets To Praying For Your Husband

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Devotion for Women ZZ

4 Secrets To Praying For Your Husband – Day 1

‘And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. ‘ Philippians 4:8(NLT)

Struggles, failures, sins, betrayals, hurts, wounds, disappointments and crushing defeats. Sound familiar? Life comes packaged with all of these challenges, and marriage provides the overcoming power not only to endure it all but hopefully to learn and by God’s grace, eventually overcome. My marriage has experienced all of these, yet today we’re stronger than ever.

Our response to the challenges life brings is always more important than the actual event. 

Each of those difficult moments is simply an obstacle that God permitted in your life so you can learn the deeper secrets of how to overcome and enjoy surpassing victories. 

How true is the saying, “Behind every successful man is an even greater woman!” Now, after almost 50 years of marriage, I’ve been asked to reveal my wife Darlene’s secrets. Not just secrets she knows, but secrets Darlene has used “on me, for me” for decades.

Proverbs 31:28-29 reminds us that what and who your husband becomes is massively related to the degree you’ve helped him. And wives who flourish in their role will inevitably hear this type of a statement from their husband and children: “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.’”

So … what are these “secret” ways to pray for husbands? I have four favorites to share with you. We’ll start with two tomorrow. 

from 4 Secrets To Praying For Your Husband