‘Josiah was eight years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem thirty-one years. He did what was pleasing in the Lord ’s sight and followed the example of his ancestor David. He did not turn away from doing what was right. During the eighth year of his reign, while he was still young, Josiah began to seek the God of his ancestor David. Then in the twelfth year he began to purify Judah and Jerusalem, destroying all the pagan shrines, the Asherah poles, and the carved idols and cast images. He ordered that the altars of Baal be demolished and that the incense altars which stood above them be broken down. He also made sure that the Asherah poles, the carved idols, and the cast images were smashed and scattered over the graves of those who had sacrificed to them. He burned the bones of the pagan priests on their own altars, and so he purified Judah and Jerusalem. He did the same thing in the towns of Manasseh, Ephraim, and Simeon, even as far as Naphtali, and in the regions all around them. He destroyed the pagan altars and the Asherah poles, and he crushed the idols into dust. He cut down all the incense altars throughout the land of Israel. Finally, he returned to Jerusalem.’ 2 Chronicles 34:1-7(NLT)
‘So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.’ 1 Corinthians 7:8-9(NLT)
Your single season is a great time to serve. There’s a reason Paul said that unmarried men and women can without distraction be focused on how to “please the Lord.” We have time, attention and energy to give. And there are many great places to invest.
Start by taking a spiritual gifts test if you haven’t already. Figure out what you’re great at. Then decide what specifically you’re passionate about. As Bill Hybels says, what’s your ‘holy discontent,’ that thing that gets you riled up, that makes you want to be part of a solution, change or renewal?
Find out what’s going on in your church or community along these lines. If it doesn’t exist, create it. Or, you may feel compelled to fill a hole that already exists. Maybe it’s a ministry you’ve never tried or even considered before; check it out. Churches always have critical needs that must be filled. This may be your time to fill one of them. I’ve done my share of snack and coffee service; I’ve filled communion cups; I’ve helped hang drywall. Am I amazing at these things? No. But I can take direction. And when a need is there, I occasionally see it as my turn to step in.
This is also a great time to do mission trips, work projects and longer-term volunteering. Young adults are often criticized for being lazy, entitled and unwilling to commit to anything. Here’s a chance to prove folks wrong. Set an example a la 1 Timothy 4:12, showing that you’re a self-starter who is willing to dig in, get things done, and lead change. You’ll turn some heads for sure. After rehearsing all the great things about singleness, my final point is going to sound weird. But here it is: Your single years are a great time to start investing in marriage, both the marriages around you, and your own future marriage.
Soak in everything you can right now. Read marriage books. Go to marriage conferences. Interview married couples. Find out what this marriage thing is all about. Singles who see marriage in their future should be passionate about marriage. We should be students of it. The first few years of marriage are an adjustment—sometimes an especially tough one. Know what to expect so you can meet it all head-on. Then you can truly enjoy the process.
from The Dating Manifesto