‘Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven! “Therefore, the Kingdom of Heaven can be compared to a king who decided to bring his accounts up to date with servants who had borrowed money from him. In the process, one of his debtors was brought in who owed him millions of dollars. He couldn’t pay, so his master ordered that he be sold—along with his wife, his children, and everything he owned—to pay the debt. “But the man fell down before his master and begged him, ‘Please, be patient with me, and I will pay it all.’ Then his master was filled with pity for him, and he released him and forgave his debt. “But when the man left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded instant payment. “His fellow servant fell down before him and begged for a little more time. ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it,’ he pleaded. But his creditor wouldn’t wait. He had the man arrested and put in prison until the debt could be paid in full. “When some of the other servants saw this, they were very upset. They went to the king and told him everything that had happened. Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’ Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he had paid his entire debt. “That’s what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart.”’ Matthew 18:21-35(NLT)
This is one of my favorite passages in all of scripture. You’re probably wondering why this strange parable about a servant who couldn’t pay his credit card debt holds that place for me. It’s one of my favorites because it’s so gripping and exposes our sinful hearts. It’s a dose of reality for so many people and how we treat the Gospel. It’s not trying to tell you to pay off your credit card loans. It’s all about forgiveness and grace, and if there’s one thing every marriage needs, it’s forgiveness.
One of the most helpful things that my wife and I continually faced when completing our pre-marital counseling was the continual reminder that we’re both human. We’re so often easy on ourselves and hard on others,. When people make a mistake, it’s such a big deal, but when we make a mistake, we try and play it down. It’s a gut check to realize you and your wife are both human. No matter how much you love each other, you will fail each other sometimes. You cannot expect perfection from an imperfect being. The quicker we understand that concept, the quicker we’ll forgive our spouse.
The passage has many compelling points, but the most revealing part is how the servant responds after being forgiven of his massive debts. Quite literally, he immediately runs and finds the nearest person who owes him money and shakes him down. We think, “That’s crazy! I would never do such a thing!” but we do it every day. It’s astounding that our hearts could be this wicked. I have been forgiven of every wrong or sin that I could ever commit. It has been completely and utterly washed away by the blood of Jesus Christ. I’m a completely new creation in Him. I’m adopted into God’s family in Heaven. Because of Jesus, God sees me as righteous. He sees me white as snow as if I never did wrong.
Then, I got mad because someone was driving a little under the speed limit this morning. Doesn’t it just sound ridiculous? I’ve found that one of the quickest ways to get rid of these petty annoyances is to dwell in what Jesus has done for me and realize that no matter where I am in life, I’m blessed. I’m blessed so I should be a blessing to others. I don’t deserve anything, yet God was merciful.
In the passage, the servant was blessed because his debts were forgiven, but he didn’t extend that blessing to the people around him. The same is true when we consider that Jesus forgave us of everything. Then, we aren’t willing to forgive our spouse and understand their human condition. You’ve got the human condition too, unfortunately. You’re both going to fail, and you’re both going to need a lot of grace for each other. There’s no better place to find it than in the loving arms of your Savior.
Uncommen Questions:
1. Why does remembering we’re sinful help us?
2. What does real forgiveness look like?
Uncommen Challenge:
Find grace and forgiveness in the arms of our Savior, and extend it to others.
Scripture Reference:
Matthew 18:21-35
from As One