Month: September 2020

‘When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went down to the region of Judea east of the Jordan River. Large crowds followed him there, and he healed their sick. Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?” “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’” And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” “Then why did Moses say in the law that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away?” they asked. Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended. And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.” Jesus’ disciples then said to him, “If this is the case, it is better not to marry!” “Not everyone can accept this statement,” Jesus said. “Only those whom God helps. Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.”’ Matthew 19:1-12(NLT)

‘Then God told Noah and his sons, “I hereby confirm my covenant with you and your descendants, and with all the animals that were on the boat with you—the birds, the livestock, and all the wild animals—every living creature on earth. Yes, I am confirming my covenant with you. Never again will floodwaters kill all living creatures; never again will a flood destroy the earth.” Then God said, “I am giving you a sign of my covenant with you and with all living creatures, for all generations to come. I have placed my rainbow in the clouds. It is the sign of my covenant with you and with all the earth. When I send clouds over the earth, the rainbow will appear in the clouds, and I will remember my covenant with you and with all living creatures. Never again will the floodwaters destroy all life. When I see the rainbow in the clouds, I will remember the eternal covenant between God and every living creature on earth.” Then God said to Noah, “Yes, this rainbow is the sign of the covenant I am confirming with all the creatures on earth.”’ Genesis 9:8-17(NLT)

We’ve been talking about marriage and how we should serve each other as husband and wife for the past four days. You’re probably thinking I’m off my rocker for including this strange Genesis 9:8-17 passage. No, I didn’t type it wrong or mean to get that other Genesis passage about how Eve is Adam’s help meet, though it’s certainly true. Here’s why I wanted you to read that passage from Genesis 9. I want you to be reminded of God’s promises, and not only His promises, but His covenants. We don’t really talk that much about covenants these days, but we should. It has everything to do with our marriage and even Jesus dying on the cross for our sins.

In our passage found in Genesis, we’re post-flood, and God is making a covenantal promise to Noah and his sons that He will never again bring a flood that would destroy the earth. That the sign of a “bow” in the sky will be His continual reminder of this promise. He will not break this covenantal promise.

Alright, now we fast forward and are in Matthew 19 where we’re talking about divorce. A sensitive subject, for good reason and I’m not intending to answer any questions about remarriage or anything of that sort; that’s most likely a question for your own pastor. What I want to talk about is covenantal love and our vows. Now, our vows are important, but your love extends far more than those words ever could. I would encourage you to not get bogged down by checking off your vows to make sure you always complete that promise to take out the trash. The bigger vow and promise you made on your wedding day is to love your wife for better or worse, till death do you part.

Our modern day marriages have ruined these words. They aren’t promises; they’re just something we say at weddings. If it doesn’t work out, oh well, I’ll get ‘em next time. I want you to consider for a moment, again, the picture of the relationship between Jesus Christ and the church. Christ is bound to the church. Now, think of all the times we as Christians have not exemplified the church in an amazing way. Whether it was secret sin or public sin, we actually fail pretty often on our side of the bargain. Jesus seems to be doing all of the leg work in this relationship and, well, that’s exactly the point. We’re always failing and Jesus is always forgiving. It’s all up to Him. We’re completely dependent upon His grace and mercy.

You did not marry your wife because you thought cleaning the house or eating dinner might get easier because you have some help now. You did not marry her because your family thought it was time to get married. You did not marry her for a tax break. You married her because it glorified God. It’s going to be hard to stay faithful and love each other for the rest of your lives. Nothing reveals that Jesus is so much better than seeing how much we fail. We fail Him all the time, and He forgives us without second thought, but it’s so much harder for us.

Your marriage is a covenant, and it is not intended to be broken. You aren’t intended to separate the moment things get hard. I pray that Christians would break the trends and not have just a slightly less divorce rate when compared to the rest of the world, but that we might have more fulfilling and more Christ-honoring marriages that point back to God’s covenantal promises.

Stay Uncommen.

Uncommen Questions::

1.How do our marriages glorify God?

2. What does covenant mean, and how can it apply today?

Uncommen Challenge: 

Have a fulfilling and Christ-honoring marriage.

Scripture References:
Matthew 19:1-12
Genesis 9:8-17

from As One

‘Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven! “Therefore, the Kingdom of Heaven can be compared to a king who decided to bring his accounts up to date with servants who had borrowed money from him. In the process, one of his debtors was brought in who owed him millions of dollars. He couldn’t pay, so his master ordered that he be sold—along with his wife, his children, and everything he owned—to pay the debt. “But the man fell down before his master and begged him, ‘Please, be patient with me, and I will pay it all.’ Then his master was filled with pity for him, and he released him and forgave his debt. “But when the man left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded instant payment. “His fellow servant fell down before him and begged for a little more time. ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it,’ he pleaded. But his creditor wouldn’t wait. He had the man arrested and put in prison until the debt could be paid in full. “When some of the other servants saw this, they were very upset. They went to the king and told him everything that had happened. Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’ Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he had paid his entire debt. “That’s what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart.”’ Matthew 18:21-35(NLT)

This is one of my favorite passages in all of scripture. You’re probably wondering why this strange parable about a servant who couldn’t pay his credit card debt holds that place for me. It’s one of my favorites because it’s so gripping and exposes our sinful hearts. It’s a dose of reality for so many people and how we treat the Gospel. It’s not trying to tell you to pay off your credit card loans. It’s all about forgiveness and grace, and if there’s one thing every marriage needs, it’s forgiveness.

One of the most helpful things that my wife and I continually faced when completing our pre-marital counseling was the continual reminder that we’re both human. We’re so often easy on ourselves and hard on others,. When people make a mistake, it’s such a big deal, but when we make a mistake, we try and play it down. It’s a gut check to realize you and your wife are both human. No matter how much you love each other, you will fail each other sometimes. You cannot expect perfection from an imperfect being. The quicker we understand that concept, the quicker we’ll forgive our spouse.

The passage has many compelling points, but the most revealing part is how the servant responds after being forgiven of his massive debts. Quite literally, he immediately runs and finds the nearest person who owes him money and shakes him down. We think, “That’s crazy! I would never do such a thing!” but we do it every day. It’s astounding that our hearts could be this wicked. I have been forgiven of every wrong or sin that I could ever commit. It has been completely and utterly washed away by the blood of Jesus Christ. I’m a completely new creation in Him. I’m adopted into God’s family in Heaven. Because of Jesus, God sees me as righteous. He sees me white as snow as if I never did wrong.

Then, I got mad because someone was driving a little under the speed limit this morning. Doesn’t it just sound ridiculous? I’ve found that one of the quickest ways to get rid of these petty annoyances is to dwell in what Jesus has done for me and realize that no matter where I am in life, I’m blessed. I’m blessed so I should be a blessing to others. I don’t deserve anything, yet God was merciful.

In the passage, the servant was blessed because his debts were forgiven, but he didn’t extend that blessing to the people around him. The same is true when we consider that Jesus forgave us of everything. Then, we aren’t willing to forgive our spouse and understand their human condition. You’ve got the human condition too, unfortunately. You’re both going to fail, and you’re both going to need a lot of grace for each other. There’s no better place to find it than in the loving arms of your Savior.

Uncommen Questions:

1. Why does remembering we’re sinful help us?

2. What does real forgiveness look like?

Uncommen Challenge: 

Find grace and forgiveness in the arms of our Savior, and extend it to others.

Scripture Reference:
Matthew 18:21-35

from As One

‘Then the mother of James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to Jesus with her sons. She knelt respectfully to ask a favor. “What is your request?” he asked. She replied, “In your Kingdom, please let my two sons sit in places of honor next to you, one on your right and the other on your left.” But Jesus answered by saying to them, “You don’t know what you are asking! Are you able to drink from the bitter cup of suffering I am about to drink?” “Oh yes,” they replied, “we are able!” Jesus told them, “You will indeed drink from my bitter cup. But I have no right to say who will sit on my right or my left. My Father has prepared those places for the ones he has chosen.” When the ten other disciples heard what James and John had asked, they were indignant. But Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them. But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must become your slave. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”’ Matthew 20:20-28(NLT)

We’ll be hanging out in the book of Matthew (with one minor detour) for the remainder of our devotional. When you’re looking for direction, I would always encourage you to visit the Gospels. Jesus has so much to teach us that you couldn’t possibly explore all of it in just a few read-throughs of the books.

Our passage of the day has almost nothing to do with marriage, but it has everything to do with Christians. It’s all about how we view the world and serve people around us. It just so happens that someone who is always around you and ready to be served is your spouse. As a result, this perfectly applies to your marriage.

It opens up with a relatively strange request by the mother of James and John, who is desiring for her sons to have high positions within the Heavens, right beneath Jesus to be exact. The question immediately misunderstands how we might consider Heaven, because it’s never been about power or levels. Greatness in Heaven has nothing to do with your status or how much honor you have, but everything to do with Jesus Christ. After all, we’re there to glorify Him. As Christ did many times during His earthly ministry, he flipped the script on what the disciples and people thought about Him. They were expecting a military leader, but didn’t get one. Now they were expecting honor and positions in Heaven, but don’t need it.

How should being a Christian shape our worldview knowing this? Certainly, the first thing that we must understand is that wealth, power, riches and other temporal passions are not what we strive for while on earth. They’re not our end goal. Some of us may attain these things and they aren’t evil on their own, but don’t make something that’s good, ultimate. Only Jesus is ultimate and later in our passage, He paints the perfect picture for how the Christian should see and act in the world. We are to serve because He first served us.

Jesus didn’t come to earth and expect people to come and serve Him; in fact, He served them in return. The Son of God, the creator of the world served them! Such a simple fact that can be overlooked sometimes. The only person worthy of praise to ever live didn’t want or need it; He served and gave His life. I wish I lived like that all the time, or even 1% of the time. Sin taints our efforts, but thankfully, God still works in and through us despite this. He can take our imperfect efforts and make them meaningful. You are called to serve your wife, and we learned that from yesterday’s devotion. Why should you serve? Because Jesus served you. He didn’t have to, but He knew that you couldn’t save yourself. He came to stand in your place and take your punishment.

So, the next time you have to sacrifice and help with the dishes, put the kids to sleep, or help with her work, remember how much Jesus served you. Your justifications for why you can’t serve just might melt away, God willing.

Uncommen Questions:

1. How do we get into Heaven?

2. Why do we serve others?

Uncommen Challenge:

Sacrifice something this week so that you have the time to serve your spouse.

Scripture Reference:
Matthew 20:20-28

from As One

‘For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body. As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” ‘ Ephesians 5:22-31(NLT)

Certainly, many of you have read over this passage when studying about marriage. We’ve even used this same passage for many of our online articles and previous devotionals. So, why do we keep using it? Because God’s Word is so rich! And, well, we’re so stubborn. I wish we could read His truths and just implement them into our programming, but it’s not that simple.

A growing trend in the younger generation is the questioning of marriage; why even do it, besides some mysterious tax break? Most dangerously, it can sometimes seep into the talk of some church members and Christians. My hope and prayer is that we never lose sight of why we marry. And, I’m sorry to disappoint you, but it has nothing to do with saving a little bit of money during tax season.

By verses 23 and 24, we should be getting some strong hints from the passage. Your marriage reflects the relationship between Jesus Christ and the Church. In almost every reference to how the wife should submit or how the husband should love, the church and Christ are mentioned in this passage. This isn’t simply a metaphor to help you get the idea; it’s a real thing that husbands and wives will reflect in their marriage. How you love your wife is intended to reflect how Christ loved, and continues to love, the church.

How does Jesus love the church? Well, He loves them so much that He went to the cross and died for their sins! He didn’t have to, but He did. What a perfect picture of the attitude that we should have as husbands for our wives. Sometimes men will abuse verse 21 to force the wife to submit to the husband’s every last desire. In actuality, what we get is a picture of sacrifice from the husband. You are to serve your wife to the degree that Christ served the church!

How backwards we have twisted the idea of submission in Christian culture and it’s led to such sorrow for women who believe they must submit to everything their husband says. When you lead your wife to sin and outside of the will of God, she has no duty to follow or submit to you. You should probably be feeling the weight of that statement. Your decisions matter, and you aren’t free to live in sin and expect everyone else to follow suit.

You’re a picture; a reflection of Jesus Christ! Surely, we’ll fall short. If you aren’t having much luck with the lottery, you can take that bet and be sure that you’ll win. You will fall short. As we learned in yesterday’s devotion, your love will be imperfect, but Jesus has grace upon grace upon grace to cover you. Why do Christians marry? Because our relationship together has much more meaning than just love and a tax break, but a spiritual meaning that shines light in our world.

Uncommen Questions:

1. Why do Christians get married?

2. How does Jesus love the church?

Uncommen Challenge::

You’re married for a purpose and your relationship reflects a whole lot more than just your own love. Understand and live that out.

Scripture Reference:
Ephesians 5:22-31

from As One

‘The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord .’ Proverbs 18:22(NLT)

‘And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’#19:5 Gen 2:24. ‘ Matthew 19:5(NLT)

‘So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions. But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses. When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God. But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things! Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives. ‘ Galatians 5:16-25(NLT)

It feels strange to offer any sort of advice or wisdom concerning marriage being a newly-married man myself. I think it’s much more comforting, for me at least, to see this less as advice and more talking through things I’ve felt and have learned as I approached marriage. 

For our first day, we’re setting up a general theme for the rest of our daily devotions. We’ll dive deep into longer texts, including a revisit to the whole of Matthew 19, but for now, dwell on the passages that were presented today.

I think a crucial element of entering marriage is a correct understanding of who you are. The Bible is very explicit that you weren’t less important before your marriage. Now that you’re married (or have been married for a while), your importance to God hasn’t risen. It’s always been high and your duties as a Christian have been present. Matthew 19:5 points out that the two shall become one flesh.

The striking thing I’ve always considered when reading this text is that two wholes created one flesh. It didn’t take some incomplete ratio of the two of us to make up the whole, but two whole people separately becoming one flesh. You, in yourself, are capable of glorifying and serving God. This isn’t all that revolutionary of a theory when we consider that Jesus never married and it seems as if Paul never married either. Both certainly accomplished much for the glory of God. What a comfort that can be for single people who aren’t blessed with a help meet.

But you are one flesh now that you’re married. So now what? Rejoice! God purposed your marriage and it was in His plan that you would join together and not serve God separately, but as one! He who finds a wife finds a good thing (Proverbs 18:22). You should be thankful that God worked through each of your lives and brought you together. You have a new role as husband and wife (which we’ll discuss tomorrow).

Spending over 6 months in premarital counseling before the wedding day prompted many conversations concerning finances, communication, family, and a whole lot more, but the whole of it can be essentially summed up by our verses found in Galatians 5:16-25. Walk by the spirit and live out the fruits of the spirit. Always so easily said, but never so easily accomplished. Respect each other, listen to one another, sacrifice, and love Jesus. Your love is imperfect and it will always be so. May we rest in the perfect love of Jesus Christ.

Uncommen Questions::

1. How important are you to God?

2. What new roles do we take on as Husband and Wife?

Uncommen Challenge::

 Serve God, together. You are now one and you’re meant to serve as one.

Scripture References:
Proverbs 18:22
Matthew 19:5
Galatians 5:16-25

from As One