‘So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. ‘ Ephesians 5:15-17(NLT)
‘Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.’ Hebrews 13:4(NLT)
‘God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin. ‘ 1 Thessalonians 4:3(NLT)
A few years ago, my son bought me a unique desktop hourglass for Father’s Day. Instead of sand, this particular hourglass is filled with iron shavings. When turned over, the shavings land on a magnet hidden under the wooden base and instantly magnetize. As they fall, the shavings form miniature iron towers, repeatedly growing and collapsing under the onslaught of new material streaming through the neck.
It is mesmerizing to watch.
Unfortunately, there is only so much material inside. Eventually, all of the shavings come to rest, and time runs out.
When I find myself with too little time, my usual response is to try to be more efficient and multitask. Just the other evening, I caught myself monitoring the weather on my tablet, checking email on my phone, and watching TV, all while supposedly spending time with my family. My body was there, but my mind was all over the place.
When Paul said we are to make the best use of our time, I doubt that he had multitasking in mind. Our spouse cannot simply be another task that we shift attention to momentarily. We must learn to give each other priority and focused attention.
Hebrews 13:4 says, “Let marriage be held in honor among all.” When we honor something, we elevate it above other things. The hourglass my son gave me stands out. It has its own spot on a shelf in my office, lifted up above the clutter of my desk.
One thing we’ve done in our house to help our marriage rise above the clutter is to share a coffee together each day. It’s a simple thing, but it forces us to put electronic devices away, look into each other’s eyes, and talk. While our conversations aren’t always profound, our dedication to that time is. Through the years, our kids have learned not to bother us while we’re having coffee unless someone is bleeding.
Psalm 144:4 says, “Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow.” None of us know how much time we have left in our hourglass. If my wife runs out of time before I do, it will hardly matter to me what the latest blog post says or what level I reached in a game on my phone. Those things will be forgotten, but the time spent over a cup of coffee never will.
What can you do to lift your marriage above the clutter?
Pray: Lord, I get so easily distracted by lesser things. Please help me to honor my marriage by giving my spouse focused attention. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
from Profound Mystery: Marriage Lessons from Ephesians